光明將至的榮耀

Escape the Dark Destructive Force

“I feel the coming glory of the light.” This last line of Edwin Arlington Robinson’s sonnet “Credo” expresses the general basis of my belief. It is my task to clear away the debris of dead emotions, regrets, and petty ambitions that the quickening light may come through. The five senses and the mystery of the breath draw in the wonder of the world, and with that the glory of God. I may seldom rise to moments of exaltation, but I try to keep myself prepared for them. Thus, I oppose the desire for oblivion that gnaws at our roots even as the light is summoning us to bloom.

The desire for oblivion conspires against the soul from outer circumstances and also from within oneself. Its agents are worry and resentment, envy and show. Its impulse is to seek things that are equally disappointing whether they are missed or acquired. Its result is an abject conviction that everything is futile. By meditation and prayer, I can escape that dark, destructive force and win my way back to the beauties of the world and the joy of God.

“我感到光明將至的榮耀”是埃德溫.阿林頓.羅賓遜的十四行詩《信條》中的最後一行，概括了我的基本信仰。我的任務便是清除死去的情感、悔恨和卑鄙慾望的殘骸，迎接加速前進的光明。五種感官和神祕的氣息感受這奇妙的世界，並隨之沐浴上帝的榮光。我很少有欣喜若狂的時候，但仍努力準備迎接這一時刻的來臨。因此，我反對棄世逃遁，這種想法即使在上帝的榮光召喚我們大顯身手時也在內心深處噬咬着我們。

棄世逃遁的想法無論是受外來的影響還是來自我們自身都不利於我們的靈魂。其誘因爲焦慮、怨恨、嫉妒和矯飾;其促成因素是尋求無論失去還是得到都同樣令人失望的東西;其後果是產生一種怯懦的想法，認爲一切均是徒勞。在冥思與祈禱中，我可以避開這種罪惡的破壞力，重新回到美麗的世界，重享上帝給我的喜樂。

I believe in my survival after death. Like many others before me, I have experienced “intimations of immortality.” I can no more explain these than the brown seed can explain the flowering tree. Deep in the soil in time’s midwinter, my very stirring and unease seems a kind of growing pain toward June.

我相信自己可以死而復生。像許多我的前輩一樣，我經歷過“不朽的暗示”。這種體驗，只有一粒褐色的種子成長爲一棵鮮花盛開的大樹的經歷才能解釋清楚：隆冬時節深深埋在泥土裏，極度的刺激和焦慮恰似一種生長的痛苦，持續到六月。

As to orthodox belief, I am an Episcopalian, like my family before me. I can repeat the Creed without asking too much margin for personal interpretation. To me it is a pattern, like the sonnet form in poetry, for the compact expression of faith. There are other patterns for other people, and I have no quarrel with these. By many paths we reach the single goal.

I believe in the good intentions of others, and I trust people instinctively. My trust has often been betrayed in petty ways, and once or twice gravely. I cannot stop trusting people, because suspicion is contrary to my nature. Nor would I, because the number of people who have justified my trust are ten to one to those who have abused it. And I know that on occasion I have myself, perhaps inadvertently, failed to live up to some trust reposed in me.

說到正統信仰，和父輩一樣，我是一名聖公會教徒，可以重複教條的教義而不太走樣。在我看來，這些教條的精義是一種模式，如同詩歌中十四行詩的形式，以凝練的方式表達信仰。他人有另外的模式，我對此無異議，因爲“我們殊途同歸”。

我相信他人的善意，並且本能地信任人。儘管信任的人常常背叛我，讓我十分不快，有一兩次他們非常卑鄙地背叛了我，我仍然相信人，因爲懷疑不是我的天性，我也不願意這樣。畢竟值得我信任與辜負我信任的人數目之比爲10：1，並且我知道，也許在無意之中，我自己也辜負了別人對我的信任。

That the universe has a purposeful movement toward spiritual perfection seems to me logical, unless we are all cells in the brain of an idiot. A belief in spiritual as well as physical evolution has sustained me in an optimism still unshaken by cynics. There may be setbacks of a century or even centuries, but they seem small reverses when measured against the vast prospect of human progress or even the record of it up to this point.

I am blessed with a buoyant temperament and enjoy the pleasures of this earth. For daily living, I would say: one world at a time. I do not wish my life to be cluttered with material things; on the other hand, I do not wish to anticipate, by fanatical self-denial, the raptures to come. Sufficient unto the day is the good thereof.

世界朝着精神完美的目標行進，這一觀點在我看來是符合邏輯的，否則我們都成了白癡的腦細胞。精神和肉體都在進化，這一信仰使我十分樂觀，憤世嫉俗者也沒有動搖這種樂觀主義。也許在一個世紀甚至幾個世紀裏會出現挫折，但與人類進步的遠大前程或與人類發展至今的歷史相比，這些挫折不過是小小的失敗。

我很幸運有開朗的性格，會享受這個世界的快樂。對於日常生活，我想說：世界每時每刻都在變化。我不希望生活充斥着物質追求;另一方面，我也不願盲目否定自我以期待神賜喜悅的來臨。一天的快樂一天當就夠了。