同事獲得了你希望的職位，你該怎麼做？
You're a smart person, and you can probably pick up on signs that you're about to be promoted. Maybe the company's expanding rapidly, or maybe your boss has invited you to a one-on-one lunch.
你很聰明，所以你可能會發現一些準備被擢升的跡象。可能是公司正快速的擴展，或者你的老闆邀請你共進一對一的午餐。
But alas, you're not a psychic. Sometimes when you think you're about to be promoted — like, you've practically uncorked the champagne — you'll be wrong. And your coworker will get the position instead.
不過呀，你又不是巫師，不能通靈。有時候當你以爲自己要被擢升了——比如，你準備開香檳酒慶祝了——那麼你就會出糗了。實際上是你的同事升職了。
You likely know what not to do in this situation: storm into your coworker's cubicle, or your boss' office, and demand that they rethink the decision.
你或許知道在這種情況不應該這麼做：怒氣衝衝地跑到同事的隔間，或者老闆的辦公室，然後要求他們重新考慮這件事情。
Figuring out what is appropriate in this situation is somewhat harder. According to Rosalinda Oropeza Randall, an etiquette and civility expert and the author of "Don't Burp in the Boardroom," the general rule is to "be very mature."
在這種情況下尋思最合適的舉措在某種程度上來說更有難度。根據禮儀專家，兼《不要在會議室打嗝》的作者，Rosalinda Oropeza Randall的建議，一般應對的方法就是“成熟應對”。
That doesn't mean you can't have feelings. "Go take a walk. Have your little pity party for 10 minutes," Randall said.
但這不意味着你不能有個人情緒。“出去散散步，度過10分鐘的的小小遺憾派對，”Randall說道。
But then you'll want to make an appointment to see your manager (or whoever made the decision). They'll be able to help clarify why they chose your coworker for the promotion, Randall said.
Randall還表示，不過之後你會想要跟經理（或者作出這個決定的管理者）見面。他們能夠他們選擇了給你的同事升職的原因。
"You don't know your coworker's background," she added. Maybe they've been taking night courses, and that tipped the scale.
“你不瞭解你同事的背景，”她補充道。也許他們一直在參與夜間課程，那麼就起到了決定性作用。
Or, alternatively, your manager may say they've had their eye on you for another position that's a better fit.
或者，有另外一種情況，你的經理可能會告訴你他們早已爲你留意了另外一個更適合你的職位了。
"Before you make a scene and really ruin your professional reputation," Randall said, "find out first."
Randall說道：“在你想要大吵大鬧並真的毀了職業名聲之前，先找出原因吧。”
Finally, you'll want to congratulate your coworker, or at least acknowledge their big win.
最終，你會想爲你的同事表示祝賀，或者至少認可他們的成功。
It's okay to use some humor, Randall said — for example, "You really gave me a run for my money!"
幽默點也沒有問題，Randall說道，比如“你真的讓我花九牛二虎之力才趕得上啊！”
Remember: Especially if they knew you were banking on this promotion, they might feel awkward, too.
請謹記：特別是如果他們知道你曾經也很渴望這次的擢升，他們也可能會感到尷尬。
Ultimately, it helps to keep your overall career in mind. Randall said this situation can be an opportunity to show how you handle defeat and disappointment — meaning if you approach it with grace, your manager might very well consider you for another promotion down the line.
最終，這件事情會幫助你把整體職業生涯放在心上。Randall表示這種情況可以作爲一個顯示你處理失敗與失望的方式的機會——意味着如果你優雅地處理它，你的經理就可能考慮在接下來的日子給你升職。
