簡單少兒英語爆笑小笑話
小朋友其實有時候不開心是很容易自愈，講個笑話就行了，小編今天就給大家分享一下英語笑話，歡迎大家收藏
簡單少兒英語小笑話
Big Head
"All the kids make fun of me ”the boy cried to his mother, "They say I have a big head."
"Don't listen to them," his mother comforted him. "You have a beautiful stop crying and go to the store for ten pounds of potatoes."
"Where is the shopping bag?"
"I haven't got one-----use your hat."
大腦袋
“所有孩子都拿我開玩笑”， 小男孩哭着和媽媽說：“他們說我腦袋大”
“別聽他們的，”母親安慰道：“你有一個很漂亮的腦袋。好啦，別哭了，去商店買10磅土豆來。”
“購物袋在哪兒?”
“我沒購物袋了----就用你的帽子吧。
英語兒童幽默笑話參考
Long Life
A man was selling medicines at a fair. At first he sold bottles of a cure for colds for just a dollar a bottle.
Many people wanted to buy it and the man's young assistant moved quickly through the crowd collecting money and handing out bottles of the cold cure.
Then, when he had a big crowd, the man held up a very small bottle.
“And now, ladies and gentlemen, ” he shouted. “here is the medicine you have been waiting for. The cure for old age. Drink just one bottle of this and you will live forever.”
“And, ladies and gentlemen,” the man continued, “I'm not going to charge you a hundred dollars a bottle for this wonderful medicine. I'm not going to charge you fifty dollars a bottle. I'm not going to charge you twenty five dollars a bottle. No, ladies and gentlemen, I'm going to charge you just ten dollars a bottle. Think, my friends, for ten dollars you can live forever.”
Most of the people in the crowd did not believe this.
One person shouted, “if it will make you live forever, why don't you drink it?”
Then another person cried , “Yes, you look as if you're at least sixty years old. ”
“Thank you, sir, thank you,” the man replied, “I'm so glad you said that. My real age is three hundred and twenty nine. ”
The crowd laughed at this but there were still a few people who wanted to believe the man. One of them spoke to the man's assistant as she passed by. “Is that true,” he asked, “that he's three hundred and twenty-nine?”
“Don't ask me,” the assistant said, “I've only worked for him for a hundred and fifty years.”
長生不老
一人在集市賣藥。起先他賣一美元一瓶的治感冒的藥。
很多人想買藥，那人的年輕助手迅速穿行於人羣中，一邊收錢，一邊遞藥。
然後當圍觀的人多起來時，那人舉起一個小瓶子。
“聽着，女士們，先生們，”那人喊道，“這就是你們一直想要的藥。
消除衰老的藥。只吃一瓶，就會長生不老。”
“女士們，先生們，”那人接着說道，“對這種神奇的藥，我不打算賣一瓶100美元。我不打算賣一瓶50美元，我也不打算賣一瓶25美元。我只打算賣一瓶10美元。想想吧，朋友們，只花10美元，你們就能長生不老。”
人羣中大多數人不相信他的話。
一人喊道：“如果這藥能使人長生不老，你爲什麼不吃?”
接着另一人叫道：“是哇，你看上去至少60歲。”
“謝謝，先生，謝謝，”那人回答，“我很高興你這麼說。我的實際年齡是329歲。”
聽到他的話，人羣中發出一陣笑聲，但仍有幾個人願意相信他的話。其中一人當那個助手經過時問她，“他已329歲了，這是真的嗎?”他問。
“別問我，”助手說，“我只爲他工作了150年。”
英語笑話兒童閱讀範文
A curious guy goes to a pet shop to buy a parrot. There he sees a parrot with a red string tied to its left leg and a green string tied to it's right leg. He asks the owner the significance of the strings1. "Well, this is a highly trained parrot. If you pull the red string he speaks French; if you pull the green string he speaks German," replies the shop keeper.
"And what happens if I pull both the strings?" our curious shopper inquires.
"I fall off my perch2 you fool!!" screeches3 the parrot.
有個人去寵物店買鸚鵡。在那裏，他看見有隻鸚鵡的左腿被紅線繫住，右腿則被綠線繫住。對此他感到不解，於是他問該店的老闆，老闆回答說：“這隻鸚鵡受過特殊的訓練。如果拉紅線，它就講法語，拉綠線，它則講德語。”
這個好奇的人接着問，“要是我兩條線都拉，會怎麼樣呢?”
“我就會掉下來了，你這個傻瓜!!”鸚鵡尖叫着說。
