名著精讀:《悉達多》 船伕(1)

By this river I want to stay, thought Siddhartha, it is the same which I have crossed a long time ago on my way to the childlike people, a friendly ferryman had guided me then, he is the one I want to go to, starting out from his hut, my path had led me at that time into a new life, which had now grown old and is dead--my present path, my present new life, shall also take its start there!
Tenderly, he looked into the rushing water, into the transparent green, into the crystal lines of its drawing, so rich in secrets. Bright pearls he saw rising from the deep, quiet bubbles of air floating on the reflecting surface, the blue of the sky being depicted in it. With a thousand eyes, the river looked at him, with green ones, with white ones, with crystal ones, with sky-blue ones. How did he love this water, how did it delight him, how grateful was he to it! In his heart he heard the voice talking, which was newly awaking, and it told him: Love this water! Stay near it! Learn from it! Oh yes, he wanted to learn from it, he wanted to listen to it. He who would understand this water and its secrets, so it seemed to him, would also understand many other things, many secrets, all secrets.
But out of all secrets of the river, he today only saw one, this one touched his soul. He saw: this water ran and ran, incessantly it ran, and was nevertheless always there, was always at all times the same and yet new in every moment! Great be he who would grasp this, understand this! He understood and grasped it not, only felt some idea of it stirring, a distant memory, divine voices.
Siddhartha rose, the workings of hunger in his body became unbearable. In a daze he walked on, up the path by the bank, upriver, listened to the current, listened to the rumbling hunger in his body.
When he reached the ferry, the boat was just ready, and the same ferryman who had once transported the young Samana across the river, stood in the boat, Siddhartha recognised him, he had also aged very much.
"Would you like to ferry me over?" he asked.
The ferryman, being astonished to see such an elegant man walking along and on foot, took him into his boat and pushed it off the bank.
"It's a beautiful life you have chosen for yourself," the passenger spoke. "It must be beautiful to live by this water every day and to cruise on it."
With a smile, the man at the oar moved from side to side: "It is beautiful, sir, it is as you say. But isn't every life, isn't every work beautiful?"
"This may be true. But I envy you for yours."
"Ah, you would soon stop enjoying it. This is nothing for people wearing fine clothes."

席特哈爾塔心想，我要留在這河邊，當年我在投奔那些孩子般的俗人路上渡過的就是這條河，一位親切友好的船伕渡我過了河，現在我要去找他。離開他的茅屋之後我曾步入了一種新生活，而現在那生活已經陳舊衰亡了——但願我現時的路、現時的新年生活能從那兒開始！
他深情地注視着奔騰的河水，注視着這一片清澈的碧綠，注視着這幅充滿神祕的畫面的透明線條。他看見從水底深處冒起明亮的珠串，平靜的氣泡飄浮在光潔如鏡的水面上，湛藍的天空倒映在水中。河水正用千萬雙眼睛盯着他，有綠色的、白色的、透明的，還有天藍色的。他多麼愛這條河呀！河水使得他心曠神怡，他多麼感激它呀！他聽見心裏有個聲音在說話，一個新覺醒的聲音對他說：愛這條河吧！留在它這兒吧！向它學習吧！噢，是的，他願意向它學，他願意傾聽它的聲音。誰若是瞭解這條河及其祕密，他覺得，也就會懂得其他許多東西，許多祕密，所有祕密。
但今天，他只看到了這條河的許多祕密之中一個最扣人心絃的祕密。他看到：河水流啊流，永不停息，卻又總是在這裏，永遠是原樣，但它又每時每記得都是新的！哦，有誰能瞭解這點、懂得這點呢！他不懂得不瞭解這一點，只是感覺到激起了聯想，遙遠的回憶，美妙的聲音。
席特哈爾塔站起身，飢餓已使他無法忍受。他動情地沿着岸邊的小路漫步走去，迎着河水，傾聽着流水聲，傾聽着腹內的飢腸轆轆聲。
他來到渡口，小船正泊在原處，依然是當年那個渡過他過河的船伕站在船裏。席特哈爾塔認出了他，他也顯老了很多。
“你願意渡我過河麼？”他問。
船伕見一以一個如此高貴的人竟獨自步行前來，很驚奇，把他接上船撐離了岸邊。
“你選擇了一種美好的生活。”客人說，“每天在這河邊生活，在這河面上行船，一定十分美好。”
船伕微笑地晃動着身子說：“是很美，先生，正像你說的那樣。可是，每一種生活，每一種工作，不都是很美好嗎？”
“也許是吧，但我還是很羨慕你這個行當。”
“啊，你很快就會沒興趣的。這可不是衣着華麗的人乾的活兒。”