想要結婚嗎?先做"配對測試"吧!

A British family law firm is urging couples to take a "compatibility quiz" before getting married or deciding to live together.

Bross Bennett's compatibility test focuses on key questions about finances, family ties, children and aspirations that most couples struggle with and might have to answer anyway if their marriage breaks down and they end up divorcing.

Partner Ruth Bross compared taking the quiz to the kind of considerations and research an employer might make before hiring someone.

"No one who is truly committed to a relationship will ever mind making the full and frank disclosure that is asked of them; if they do, you might like to ask yourself why," she said in an emailed statement containing the quiz.

The quiz asks about assets and how each party would like to share them, what kind of relationships they have with their extended family and friends, whether they want children, their religious views, spending habits and career plans:

A copy of the quiz is below:

Finance

Do you know the extent of each other's assets? How do you both view the sharing of these assets? Do you have the same attitude to saving?

Will one of you want to put into a pension what the other wants to put into a new car?

Will you pool your resources or do you want to keep everything separate? Joint accounts or separate? Will you contribute in proportion to your incomes, or equally?

Are you going to have to pay off your partner's debts perhaps from what you thought was going to be the deposit on your house?

Family Ties

What sort of relationship do you have with your extended family? Are they good at staying in touch? Are they local? Affectionate? Over-involved? Have you had any major fallings out?

Children

Do you want children? How many? How do you want to raise your children? What sort of values do you want to pass on?

Religion

What are your religious views -- do you agree on what religion you will bring up the children in? Church/mosque/synagogue? Once a week or once a year? Or no religion at all.

Leisure and fun

Do you like doing the same things in your spare time? Do you share common interests? Is your idea of a holiday lying flat on the beach for two weeks and your partner's rock-climbing?

Lifestyle

What sort of lifestyle are you aiming for? Where do you want to live?

Spending

Do you have an expensive shoe or gadget habit? Does one of you think of a particular purchase as an essential that the other regards as a "discretionary spend"? Do you have any other secret addictions: handbags, chocolate, football? Do you gamble, online or otherwise?

Work

Are your respective career paths compatible, is either of you going to have to make compromises? Are you prepared to? Will you want to give up work when you have children? What does your partner think about this and can you manage financially? What about part-time working?

Roles - traditional or modern?

Will you expect to live along traditional lines: woman as homemaker and man as breadwinner? Who will organise the finances? Will household responsibilities be shared equally? Who will assume responsibility for paying bills?

Honesty

Are there any old flames for whom you still hold a candle?

英國一家家庭法律事務所建議情侶們在結婚或決定同居之前先做個“配對測試”。

布洛斯•貝內特事務所的“配對測試”主要考察金錢、家庭關係、孩子、以及志向等方面的關鍵問題。這些都是婚姻破裂，以離婚收場時，大多數夫婦都糾纏不休，又不得不面對的問題。

事務所合夥人魯思•布洛斯將做這項測試比作老闆招聘員工前的考查。

她在談到這項測試的一封郵件聲明中說：“真正對兩人的關係認真負責的人不會介意毫無保留而且坦誠地回答這些問題，如果他們介意的話，你就要問問自己爲什麼了。”

測試中提到的問題包括財產，以及每位家庭成員將如何分享這些；與親友的關係如何；是否想要孩子；宗教信仰；消費習慣；以及職業規劃等。

下面就來看看這些測試題吧：

金錢

你們互相瞭解對方的財產情況嗎？你們如何看待這些財產的分配？你們對儲蓄持相同看法嗎？

會不會一方想存養老金，另一方想買輛新車？

你們將共享資源，還是分開管理？開設共有賬戶還是個人賬戶？家庭支出按收入比例，還是平攤？

你會把準備買房的錢拿來給對方還債嗎？

家庭關係

你和其他家庭成員之間是何種關係？他們善於保持聯絡嗎？在當地嗎？感情很深？過於親密？你和他們有大的矛盾嗎？

孩子

你想要孩子嗎？想要幾個？你想怎樣撫養孩子？你想把怎樣的價值觀傳遞給下一代？

宗教

你的宗教觀是什麼？你們對培養孩子的宗教信仰達成共識了嗎？基督教、伊斯蘭教、還是猶太教？一週還是一年參加一次宗教活動？或者無宗教信仰？

休閒娛樂

你們在休閒時間的娛樂方式一樣嗎？有沒有共同的興趣愛好？是否會出現你覺得放假時最好去沙灘曬兩週太陽，而你的伴侶想去攀巖的情況？

生活方式

你想要什麼樣的生活方式？你想在哪裏生活？

消費

你有買很貴的鞋子或者小玩意的習慣嗎？會不會有一方覺得某種特定的消費是必須品，而另一方覺得“太隨意”？你有其它不爲人知的購物癮嗎？比如手袋，巧克力，足球？你賭博嗎？參與在線賭博還是其他方式？

工作

你們的職業規劃協調一致嗎？是否有人要做出妥協？你們準備好這樣了嗎？有了孩子以後你要放棄工作嗎？你的伴侶對此怎麼想？這樣做不會經濟拮据吧？做個兼職怎麼樣？

定位---傳統型還是現代型？

你希望按照傳統方式生活嗎？女人做家庭主婦，男人養家餬口？誰掌管財政大權？家庭職責要平等分擔嗎？誰來付賬單？

忠誠

你還在懷念舊情人嗎？

Vocabulary:

extended family: a social unit that contains the nuclear family together with blood relatives, often spanning three or more generations（大家庭，幾代同堂的家庭）

joint accounts: a bank account in the names of two or more persons or parties and subject to withdrawals by each（兩人共有的銀行賬戶）

falling out: a quarrel or estrangement between persons formerly in close association with one another. Use falling out in a Sentence See images of falling out Search falling out on the Web（爭吵，不和）

rock-climbing: 攀巖

breadwinner: a person who earns a livelihood, esp. one who also supports dependents（養家餬口的人，負擔家計的人）

old flame: a former sweetheart or lover（舊情人）