丈夫失業以來,我的世界分崩離析大綱
Dear Coleen,
親愛的科琳，I probably feel the lowest I ever felt have in my life. My husband lost his job recently, which means we're facing a very uncertain New Year with two children and a big mortgage.
我感覺現在的我處於人生最低谷。近來，我丈夫失業了，這也意味着我們的新年註定不安穩，畢竟我們還有2個孩子要養、有貸款要還。I only work part-time as our kids are still young, and my earnings aren't enough to cover all our expenses. I just want to shut myself away at the moment, whereas my husband's way of dealing with it is to carry on as if nothing has happened.
因爲孩子還小，所以我找了份兼職工作，收入不足以支付全家消費。現在，我只想把自己關起來，而丈夫對待這件事的態度卻是：若無其事的照往常一般生活。
He seems determined to see our friends over New Year and go to parties, and I just can't face it. We haven't told anyone that he's lost his job yet (with the exception of our parents) and I don't want people to know for the time being, which is causing a lot of tension between us.
他已決定好要在新年和朋友一起參加聚會，但我做不到啊！關於他失業一事，我們尚未告訴任何人（除了雙方父母）。我暫時不想讓其他人知道這件事，這也使我們的關係變得緊張。We have a really lovely home and a nice lifestyle that we've worked hard for and I can't bear the thought of losing everything we've built up. The problem is, we're not really talking about it and we're just coping alone in very different ways.
我們的家庭溫馨，生活方式健康，這都是我們努力奮鬥的結果。一想到可能會失去這一切，我就無法忍受。但問題是：我們並沒有好好談過這件事，只是以自己的方式獨自應對。
Coleen says
科琳說I think the worst thing you can do is not talk about it and shove it under the carpet because it's not going to just go away. It must be very hard for your husband and he's clearly trying to put a brave face on things and be positive, and I think it's good that he still wants to be with people instead of retreating into himself.
我認爲對這件事避而不談是最糟糕的做法，因爲問題不會自行得到解決。你的丈夫肯定很難過，但顯然，他正努力勇敢地面對這件事並積極應對，我認爲他在這種時候仍願意與人交往而非自我封閉是一件好事。Sadly, you're not alone in this - it happens to a lot of people, especially in the current economic climate. I'm wondering why you don't want people to know? To me, it feels as if you're embarrassed and worried about being judged by your friends, and you shouldn't feel like that. You don't have to impress real friends - they go through it with you and they will be supportive.
不幸的是，你並非一個人--很多人都會遇到這種情況，尤其是在當前的經濟環境之下。我很好奇，你爲什麼不想讓其他人知道？給我的感覺是，你覺得失業很丟臉，擔心朋友因此說三道四，你不應這麼想。你無需事事都給真朋友留下好印象--他們會支持你，陪你度過這一難關。So talk to your husband and make some interim plans for the immediate future. Yes, it's a very stressful situation, but it doesn't mean your husband won't get another job in the New Year.
所以，和丈夫好好談一談，並做出短期計劃。是的，這段時間你們的壓力很大，但這並不意味着你的丈夫在新年裏不會找到一份新工作啊。
