爆笑：每天起牀我們都要經歷的18個階段
The struggle we all endure.
我們都要經歷的痛苦掙扎……
1. Hearing that dreaded first alarm.
聽見可怕的第一聲鬧鈴。
2. It really feels like you haven’t even slept.
真心覺得自己還沒開始睡覺就要起牀了。
3. You begin your first bit of exercise — hitting the snooze button.
你開始熱身了——按下鬧鐘的小睡按鈕。
4. Then there is the all important first attempt at getting up out of bed. It really is too much effort.
接下來就是最重要的——第一次嘗試起牀。艾瑪，太費勁了！
5. And then deciding that you have expended all of your energy.
得出結論：精力已耗盡。
6. Realizing that you have now overslept and going into panic mode.
意識到自己睡過頭了，開啓恐慌模式。7. You rush out of bed in such a hurry that you undoubtedly run into something.
你急急忙忙從牀上躍起，果斷撞上了什麼東西。
8. Maybe “rush” is too strong of a word.
可能“躍起” 這個單詞不準確，太強烈了...
9. You also make the all important call.
你也會打這些重要的電話。（我正在車上，5分鐘就到！很熟悉有木有...）
10. Now out of bed, you realize walking around tired is a lot like stumbling around drunk.
現在已經下牀了，但你發覺自己疲倦地遊走很像酒後跌跌撞撞。
11. You finally turn on the light or open the blinds.
終於，你開了燈或者打開了百葉窗。
12. The thought, Who needs a life? I have my bed, crosses your mind at least once…
你腦海裏至少浮現了一次這種想法：誰需要生活？有我的牀就夠了……
13. And despite it only being a few minutes, you already miss your pillow.
儘量只下牀了幾分鐘，你已經開始想念自己的枕頭。
14. You’re also a ray of sunshine for anyone that has the pleasure of meeting you in the next hour.
對於在接下來的一個小時內很榮幸見到你的人來說，你就是一束陽光呢。
15. And you begin to think that everyone seems far more awake and cheery than you, it’s almost unnatural…
你開始覺得每個人好像都比你更清醒，更愉快，這太不科學了……
16. when you feel like this...
當你有這種感覺……
17. Then you get coffee…
然後，你喝咖啡了……
18. And finally all is right in the world!
終於，世界和諧了！
