我們都曾經歷過：生活教會我的8堂人生課

Recently, I celebrated another birthday. As I look back at how quickly time passes, I am amazed at how much can change in a matter of a year. I think we go through cycles of change -- when the complete unexpected throws you off your equilibrium --giving you the opportunity to reassess and recalibrate.
不久前我慶祝了又一個生日。回首往事，時間確如白駒過隙，一年之中可以發生怎樣的變化啊！我覺得我們在經歷變化循環。當完全出乎意料的事情打破你的舊平衡，就是給你機會重新估價自己並校正方向。

This past year was one of those cycles for me -- and slowly but surely the pieces that were thrown up in the air are falling into place. At a time of reflection, I'd like to share with you some of the things I have learned.
對我來說，過去的一年是那些循環中的一環，慢慢地卻確信無疑地被拋起然後回落的過程。反思之餘，希望能與你分享我的一些心得。

1. The difference between happy people and unhappy people is their level of gratitude.
快樂的人與不快樂的人的不同，在於他們對生活抱有多少感激。

If you observe anyone who is miserable, you will notice they are never satisfied and constantly blaming their history, luck or other people for their struggles. If you observe happy people, they are full of gratitude.
在觀察痛苦感傷的人時，你會發現他們總是不滿足於現狀並且不停地抱怨自己的過去、運氣或別人的競爭。在觀察快樂的人時，你會發現他們滿懷感激。

Instead of focusing on what they don't have to achieve/attract love/move forward -- they choose to focus on solutions to create the life they want. Even when these people are triggered by a bad turn of events, after reacting with sadness/frustration/stress/anger -- they get back to their baseline of happiness in due time.
他們集中精力尋找創造他們想要的生活的途徑，而不是爲一些無關緊要的事情勞心傷神。甚至當受到負面衝擊而爆發，在傷心/挫折/緊張/生氣之後，他們會適時地回到幸福底線。

Studies show that you can actually rewire your brain for happiness by practicing gratitude on a daily basis. Gratitude is a choice. Happiness is an attitude. How you will live your days is a choice that is completely within your control.
研究顯示，每天下意識地讓自己感激，你就能調整你的大腦對幸福的感知。感激是一種選擇，幸福是一種態度。如何度過每一天完全在於你自己。

2. You will have your heart broken, and you will survive.
你會心碎，但你會熬過去。

You'd think that one would get better at handling heartaches with age. But they don't get any easier or less painful, do they?
你會認爲，隨着年齡的增長人們會更得心應手地應對心痛。但是，並不是生活對他們來說更容易、更少心痛，不是嗎？

While the intensity of hurt can be just as potent, if not more, with each relationship that comes and goes, I have learned that we have an unbreakable spirit that enables us to get back up even after the most crushing of heart experiences.
痛苦可能具有極大的殺傷力，但從各種過往關係中，我知道我們有一種堅不可摧的精神，它甚至能在我們遭受最痛苦的經歷之後治癒我們的創傷。

When you're going through the pain of separation it can be difficult to imagine being happy again. But nobody can take away your baseline of joy and happiness.
當遭受離別之痛時，很難想象你會再度擁抱幸福。但是沒有人能帶走你的快樂與幸福底線。

Even if you are knocked off your feet for a period of time, you do eventually get back to your equilibrium. If you're going through that dark stage where you feel stuck in suffering, try and remember this: You will love again. You will be loved again.
即使你一度被擊垮，但你最終會恢復平衡。如果你覺得正在遭受無法擺脫的痛苦，一定要記住：你會再次愛別人，你會再次贏得別人的愛。

3. You will lose your job, and eventually find a better fit.
你可能會失去工作，而結果你獲得了一份更適合你的工作。

Endings are just new beginnings in disguise. You may be uncomfortable with the uncertainty, but some of the best things in life are born from those times of being open to new opportunities.
結束正是新起點的僞裝。面對不確定性你或許不安，但是生命中一些極好的事情卻誕生於擁抱新機遇的時刻。

4. People you love will hurt you and disappoint you. Try to look beyond their mistakes and understand their intentions.
你愛的人會傷害你並讓你大失所望。努力發現他們錯誤之外的閃光點，理解他們的意圖。

I used to be black and white with friendships. A friend was either a BFF or a mere acquaintance; there wasn't much gray area in between. And if a friend hurt me or didn't encompass the values I did, I'd cut that friendship off.
我曾非常極端地看待友情。要麼一生的朋友要麼點頭之交，沒有太多中間地帶。如果一個朋友傷害了我或者不認可我的所作所爲，那我們的友誼將就此了結。

But I've learned that we all can act a little selfish, forget to consider the people we love, or take others for granted. And that's okay. People go through phases, people make mistakes -- that shouldn't discount a history of times your friend was there for you.
但是，我認識到我們大家都有點自私，會忘記爲我們所愛的人去考慮或認爲別人爲我們做事理所當然。其實沒什麼，人們會經歷各種階段，人們會犯錯誤——這些不應該抹殺他們曾給予你的支持。

Sometimes a friendship just needs time to breathe before it can flow again. And that's okay, too.
有時爲擺脫僵局，給友情一個喘息的機會。這樣也是可以的。5. One's nature does not change.
本性難移

Our perspectives, our appearances, our disposition can constantly change. But our core nature generally does not. People learn survival mechanisms at a fairly young age -- and that way of being becomes reinforced and ingrained.
我們的觀點、外貌和性情不斷變化着，但通常情況下我們的核心本質卻始終如一。人們幼年時學會生存機制，還有使其強化並根植於內心的方法。

When I asked a dear friend of mine why he chose to be in my life during my early twenties when I was so insecure and unstable, he responded, "I saw you for your essence. And that has always been a constant."
當問起一個密友爲什麼在我不諳世事的20多歲就選擇我做朋友時，他回答：“我看到了你的本性，本性難移。”

If you want to truly see someone, look past their words, their charm and their charisma. Look past their disposition and even their mistakes. Look past the presentation and you'll find their essence. Because while everything superficial can change, one's nature does not.
如果你想真正瞭解一個人，那就要挖掘他們語言、容貌、魅力、性情和錯誤背後的東西。揭去面紗，纔會發現本質。因爲一切表面的東西可以改變，而一個人的本性卻會一直保持下去。

6. Be selective of who you share your heart and body with.
選擇能與之分享身心的朋友。

We harm our spirit when we go against the integrity of our own values. Know your boundaries and what you are willing and not willing to negotiate. And remember, just because something feels good in the present moment doesn't mean it's a healthy decision for your future.
當與自己價值觀的完整性背道而馳時，我們將會傷到元氣。瞭解你的底線和妥協基準。記住現在覺得不錯的決定並非就意味利於未來發展。

Ask the right questions so you don't keep making the same mistakes. What sort of relationship do you want to attract in your life? Is the decision you are making bringing you closer to that or steering you off that path?
找準問題，這樣纔不會總在同一處跌倒。你想在生活中擁有什麼樣的關係？你要做的決定會帶你走近理想還是偏離軌道？

7. Your body is not invincible.
你的身體不是鐵打的。

Unfortunately many of us wait until there is a health scare, and then react to fix it, instead of being proactive to avoid it. Your immune system is critical to identifying and destroying foreign and potentially cancerous cells.
不幸地是，我們許多人等着健康受到威脅纔會警醒，而不是去提早預防。你的免疫系統對識別和摧毀非正常和潛在癌細胞至關重要。

Stress, not eating, eating unhealthy food -- these can all be factors that contribute to weakening your immune system. And when it's weakened, those mutated cells are not recognized by your immune system.
壓力、禁食、食用不健康食品都會削弱你的免疫系統。免疫系統功能一旦降低，就識別不出發生突變的細胞了。

The bad cells are then nourished just like healthy cells, causing the cells to duplicate and potentially become cancerous cells.
這些壞傢伙如同健康細胞一樣受到滋養並自我複製，有可能轉變成癌細胞。

Take care of your body. Even if you think you're invincible, consider that it is the people who love you that will suffer if something were to happen to your health. If you won't do it for yourself, do it for the people who care about you.
關愛你的身體。即使你認爲自己強壯無敵，但試想一下，如果你的健康出了問題，愛你的人們就會遭秧。即使不爲自己，也爲關心你的人去愛護自己的身體。

8. When it doesn't work out with someone in the present, it's because it's meant to work out with someone else in the future.
即使這一點目前幫不上你，那一定會在日後對其他人有所幫助。

It applies to relationships and opportunities as well. We can get so caught up expecting a particular outcome, only to get overwhelmed by disappointment when things don't pan out the way we planned.
這一點同樣適用於關係和機遇。我們可能熱切期待着一個特別的驚喜，但當事情沒有按計劃實現時，卻得到被失望淹沒的結果。

During the moment, it may feel that life is out of sorts, but have faith that there is a bigger, better plan for you, and each person that touches your life is just preparing you for the person you're meant to be with.
此時，你可能感覺生活不如意，但要堅信一個更大、更美好的計劃在等你，界入你生活的每個人都在打造你，讓你成爲你想成爲的那個人。