雙語散文:喜歡自己多一點

喜歡自己多一點

Like Yourself More

Recently I turned to a friend who was riding in my car and asked her, “What do you like about yourself?” We rode in silence for several minutes. Finally, she turned to me and said, apologetically, “I can’t think of anything.”

I was stunned. My friend is intelligent, charming, and compassionate – yet she couldn’t see any of that.
I know she’s not alone. Low self-esteem has become the number-one issue plaguing women. Despite God’s assurance that he’s absolutely crazy about us, most of us can’t believe he means us. It’s like the cynical editor who tells the cub reporter, “If your mother says she loves you, check it out.”

I was a reporter for 12 years. One of the first things I learned in researching a story was “garbage in, garbage out.” If your raw date is flawed, you end up with a faulty conclusion. The same is true with how we see ourselves. If we lack self-confidence, maybe we’re working with flawed data.

The reality is, in hundreds of subtle ways, our culture, family, friends – even our thought life – conspire to undermine our confidence. We grow up in families void of affirmation, encouragement, and respect – the building blocks to self-confidence. Then we find ourselves smack dab in the middle of a world that lionizes Size Two Hollywood starlets and Barbie-doll figures. Our paycheck, our title, or some other artificial yardstick gives us temporary entrée into the world of The Accepted. But in our hearts, we know it isn’t real. How do we find our way to the truth?

最近, 我問坐在我車裏的一位朋友: “你喜歡自己什麼?” 沉默了好幾分鐘後, 她轉向我, 滿臉歉意地說: “我想不出來.”

我十分詫異, 她竟然看不到自己的任何優點. 她是一個多麼聰明, 美麗迷人而又富有同情心的姑娘啊!!!

我深知並非只有她一人如此, 自尊心較低已成爲女性最大的困擾. 儘管上帝保證深愛着我們, 但我們大多數人不能相信他說的”我們”. 就像憤世嫉俗的編輯對初出茅廬的記者說: “如果你媽媽說她愛你, 那就去確認一下吧.”
我已經做了12年的記者, 在採訪中我首先學到的是 “錯進, 錯出”. 若你的初始資料有誤, 那麼你的結論也不會正確. 同理, 我們看待自己也是如此. 如果我們缺乏自信心, 那也是在操作有錯誤的數據資料.

事實上, 通過許多種微妙的方式, 我們的信心被文化, 家庭, 朋友甚至是精神生活共同削弱. 我們成長的家庭缺乏肯定, 鼓勵和尊重, 而這些正是建立自信的基石. 於是, 我們發現, 自己所處的世界推崇好萊塢二流明星和芭比娃娃的形象. 我們的薪水, 頭銜或者其他人爲的標準讓我們臨時步入所謂的上流社會. 但是, 在內心深處, 我們知道它並不真實, 那通往真實的道路到底在哪裏呢?

1. apologetically 道歉地, 辯解地，如：

he spoke apologetically about his past.
他談到他的過去時感到很抱歉。

2. stun 使...震聾,使...震驚，如：

Koch, whose attacks on opponents are no-holds barred, said that he is really caring and compassionate.
攻擊對手不擇手段的葛德華說，他對人非常關懷並具同情心。

The fall stunned him.
那一跌跤使他不省人事。

3. compassionate 有同情心的

A remnant or trace of an organism of a past geologic age, such as a skeleton or leaf imprint, embedded and preserved in the earth's crust.
化石埋置並保存於地層中的古生物遺體、遺物和其生活遺址，如骨骸、葉子的印痕等

The plight of the refugees arouses the compassionate old man.
難民的困苦喚醒了那位有同情心的老人。

4. conspire 陰謀,協力,共謀

The bad weather conspire with some other unpleasant cause to ruin our picnic.
壞天氣加上其他一些不愉快原因使我們的野餐令人大爲掃興。

Events seemed to be conspiring to bring about his ruin.
許多事好象協同促成了他的失敗。

5. lionize 崇拜,看重

Marilyn wanted to be loved, not lionized.
瑪裏琳要的是愛而不是崇拜。