社會人必修課:提高溝通技能的9種方法大綱

Communication is an essential part of work and home life. Understanding how to be a good communicator can be an important productivity tool, one that’s frequently neglected. Poor communication can often have disastrous results; lost time, injured feelings, frustration, ineffective meetings, unproductive teamwork, resulting in a general lack of career advancement and goal achievement. To become effective communicators we need to be aware of a few fundamental tips we can use in our work and life interactions. Regardless of the situation, the same rules apply.
溝通是工作和生活中都必不可少的一部分。瞭解如何能更好地溝通可以極大地提高工作效率，但是這一點往往被人們所忽略。溝通不善經常會導致損失慘重；浪費時間、傷害感情、令人失望、會議無效、團隊工作沒有收穫，結果是很難在職場晉升，也很難實現目標。要想有效地溝通，我們需要了解幾個基本的溝通方法，把這些方法用在工作和生活的交往中。無論何種情況，這些規則都適用。

1. Show Appreciation
1. 表示感謝

Prior to getting into the meat of your conversation, be sure to express your thanks for the other individual’s time. Time is an extremely precious resource, and it is important to be respectful and considerate of that. Also, complement or recognize any positive contribution they are making. Appreciation and praise can go a long way towards building good rapport.
在開始談話之前，一定要向對方抽出時間和你談話表示感謝。時間是非常寶貴的資源，能意識到這一點並表示敬意是非常重要的。另外，對他人做出的貢獻要給予認可並加以讚美。欣賞和讚美對建立融洽的關係有很大幫助。

2. Connect
2. 建立聯繫

Connect on a personal level if possible. Look for places where interests overlap if any exist. Even in a professional situation, there may be some personal interests in common, hobbies, sports, children, etc. Take care to avoid such controversial topics as political leanings or religious beliefs. A real sense of connection makes a difference in the tone and outcome of the current conversation and most likely future communications as well.
有可能的話和他人建立私交。看一下你們是否有相同的興趣。即使是專業人士，也會有一些相同的興趣和業務愛好，如體育愛好、育兒等。要注意避免如政治傾向或宗教信仰等有爭議性的話題。建立私交後，談話的語氣和結果都會變得不同，未來的交流也可能有所不同。

3. Stay positive
3. 保持積極的心態

Maintaining a positive attitude is crucial to productive communications. Be constructive rather than negative or complaining. People shut down, effectively ending any real communication when they feel attacked or criticized. Be encouraging and kind even when expressing concerns or displeasure.
要想有效地溝通，保持積極的心態至關重要。要給出建設性的建議，而不是負面的批評或者抱怨。當人們覺得受到攻擊或批評時，就會斷絕聯繫不進行任何真正溝通。即使是表達憂慮或不悅時也要友善待人、振奮人心。

4. Watch tone
4. 注意語調

While it’s sometimes necessary to be assertive in order to make your point, don’t be aggressive. There is a fine line between the two. Try not to cross it. An adversarial tone is not in any way productive. Be confident and direct, while still adopting a calm, cooperative tone.
雖然有時在陳述自己觀點時要顯得自信，但是不要咄咄逼人。這兩者之間有着細微的界限，不要越界。對抗性的語調不會有任何好的 結果。要自信而率直，並保持沉着合作的語調。5. Focus on the result
5. 關注結果

It’s important to figure out what result you are after before you start the conversation. Knowing your objective helps you to direct the conversation and to remain on point. What are you hoping to accomplish? Are you trying to give help, resolve a conflict, or collaborate on a project or issue? Are you seeking advice or trying to influence behavior? Your desired outcome helps to determine the flow of communication.
在談話前想清楚談話的結果非常重要。明確目標能助你直達主題並讓對話圍繞主題展開。你想完成什麼？你是想得到幫助，還是想解決爭端，抑或合作完成一個項目或解決一個問題？你是在尋求建議還是想影響對方的行爲？你想要的結果會影響談話的發展。

6. Listen
6. 學會傾聽

Eye contact is crucial. Be polite and don’t interrupt. No one likes being interrupted and though it’s natural to want to rush in to make your point, it’s very disrespectful of the other person’s thoughts. Try to understand the other person’s perspective. Maintain an open mind. Learning how to value different viewpoints can be an important communication tool.
眼神交流很重要。要有禮貌，不要打斷對方的談話。沒有人喜歡被人打斷，每個人急着想表明自己的觀點，這是非常自然的，但這卻是對別人想法的不尊重。試着去理解他人的想法。保持開放的態度。學會去權衡不同的觀點是非常重要的溝通技能。

7. Notice non-verbal cues
7. 注意身體語言

Watch body language. Lack of eye contact, distraction, or fidgeting are often signs of restlessness or impatience. Yawning or sighing are usually signs of mental or physical fatigue. When you notice these types of non-verbal signals, it’s a sign that this conversation is not going to be a productive one. Quickly wrap up the conversation, postpone the conversation, or inquire about the discomfort if your relationship allows.
觀察身體語言。要是對方缺少眼神交流、或分神、坐立不安，這往往是煩躁不安或不耐煩的標誌。打哈欠或嘆氣通常是精神或身體上疲倦的標誌。當你注意到這些類型的非語言信號時，你要知道這表示這次對話不會有什麼作用。迅速完成談話或推遲談話。如果你們的關係還不錯的話，還可以問一下對方是不是不舒服。

8. Request feedback
8. 尋求反饋

Confirm that you have a mutual understanding of what’s being communicated. We often think that we’ve reached a resolution and come to an understanding, only to find out that we have completely misunderstood the other person’s thoughts. This not only confirms that you have successfully communicated; it also makes the other person feel that they have been heard and understood.
確認一下雙方對談話內容的理解是不是一致。我們經常以爲形成了解決方案、達成了共識，結果往往是我們完全誤解了他人的想法。尋求輸入和反饋。尋求反饋不僅能確保順利溝通，也會讓對方感覺到你在傾聽並理解了他們的想法。

9. Follow-up
9. 後續工作

Be clear about what actions will be taken and establish accountability. Confirm deadlines, responsibility, and expectations. If relevant, document any agreements in writing. A clear understanding of what is supposed to happen next can help avoid a conflict later on.
要清楚會採取何種行動並建立問責制。確認最後期限、責任和期望。如果可以，把相關的協議用書面的形式保存下來。明確下一步能夠避免過後的爭端。

Always try to end your communication in a friendly manner. Reiterate your thanks and try to leave the other individual feeling understood and valued. Productive communication involves respect, consideration, awareness, and clarity. It is possible to be both direct and kind and still get the results you want.
儘量用友好的態度去結束每一次交流。重申你的感謝之意並讓他人感到你的理解和珍視。想要交流取得成效，你需要尊重關心談話對方，感悟和明確談話內部。你可以率直而友善地與對方交流，也還是能得到你想要的結果。