最搞笑的簡單英語笑話
冷笑話是近幾年新興的一種語言現象,它輕鬆詼諧、別具一格,給我們緊張的生活增添了幾分輕鬆的情趣,它一出現便受到了大多數人的喜愛。小編精心收集了簡單英語笑話短文，供大家欣賞學習!
The visit to the doctor
拜訪醫師
A Man asked his doctor if he thought he'd live to be a hundred .
一個男人問他的醫師是否認爲他會活到一百歲。
The doctor asked the man ,"Do you smoke or drink ?"
醫師問這個男人：“你抽菸或喝酒嗎?”
" No ,"he replied , "I have never done either ."
他回答說：“不，我從不抽菸喝酒。”
" Do you gamble,drive fast cars ,and fool around with woman?" inquired the doctor .
醫師問說：“你賭博、開快車、玩女人嗎?”
"No,I have done any of those things either."
“不，我也從不幹那些事情。”
"Well then," said the doctor ," what do you want to live to be a hundred for?"
醫師說：“那你幹嗎要活到一百歲呀?”
簡單英語笑話短文篇2All In the family
都在這一家
Eight-year-old Sally brought her report card home from school .
八十歲大的 莎莉從學校把她的成績報告卡帶回家。
Her marks were good mostly .
她的成績不錯，
A's and a couple of B'S .
大部分都是A，還有幾個B。
However ,her teacher had written across the bottom,
可是， 她韻老師在卡片下方寫道：
"SALLY is a smart little girl,but she has one fault,
“莎莉是個聰明的小女孩，但是她有一個毛病。
she talks too much in school.I have an idea I am going to try,
她在學校太愛講話。我有一個想法我要來試試看，
which I think may break her of the bad habit."
我認爲.這個想法可能會讓她改掉這個壞習慣。”
Sally's dad signed her report card,
莎莉的爸爸簽了她的學習報告卡，
putting a note on the back ,
並在卡片背面註記：
"Please let me know if your idea work on SALLY
“如果你的想法對莎莉很有效，請你讓我知道，
because I would like to try it out on her mother."
因爲我想要把它試用在她媽媽身上。
簡單英語笑話短文篇3Laboratory Tests
實驗室檢查
Two children were sitting outside a clinic.
有兩個小孩子坐在一間診療室外面。
One of them was crying very loudly.
其中一個小孩子哭得非常犬聲。
2nd Child;Why are you crying?
第二位小孩子說：“你爲什麼哭呀?”
1st Child:I came here for blood test.
第一位小孩子說：“我來這裏驗血呀”
2nd Child：So?Are you afraid?
第二位小孩子說：“那又怎樣?你害怕呀?”
1st Child :No the blood test,they cut my finger.
第一位小孩子說：“不怕呀，又不是那樣啦。因爲驗血的話，他們要割我的手指頭啦。”
At this,the second one started crying.
一聽到這麼說，第二位小孩子就開始哭了，
The first one was astonished.
第一位小孩子就非常驚訝。
1st Child :Why are you crying now?
第一位小孩子說：“你現在爲什幺哭呀?”
2nd Child :I have come for my urine?test!
第二位小孩子說：“我來這裏微尿液檢驗的啦.!”
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