雙語閱讀：六種方式讓感情持久保鮮

摘要：假如你有固定伴侶，或早已邁入婚姻殿堂，你便能體會到：在感情中，若想保持起初的新鮮和刺激感，可不是一件容易的事。

If you’re in a long term relationship or marriage, youknow that it’s not always easy to keep that warmglow of freshness and excitement alive in yourrelationship。

After the first bout of heady romantic love is gone,everyday sameness settles into any relationship

假如你有固定伴侶，或早已邁入婚姻殿堂，你便能體會到：在感情中，若想保持起初的新鮮和刺激感，可不是一件容易的事。

當最初那陣令人迷醉又轉瞬即逝的浪漫散去，你們的小日子裏便漸漸開始被日復一日的枯燥所佔據了。

And unless you’re making conscious efforts to keep things hot, soon boredom and tediumtakes the shine off one of the most special relationships of your life, making it feel like justanother chore. So what are these conscious efforts that you can make?

除非刻意保持新鮮感，否則這段生命中最特別的關係將會被無聊和單調抹去它原有的光輝，使你厭倦不堪。那麼，該如何來有意識地避免這種事發生?

Here are some of the tricks my husband and I frequently use to keep things as new andhappening as our first few days。

我和我的丈夫是通過以下的幾個小技巧，來保持兩人間的新鮮感的。

　　1. Surprise Surprise!

驚喜!驚喜!

Couples spend weeks – sometimes months – planning for the next birthday/anniversary gift fortheir spouse/significant other。

通常，倆口子會一起計劃下一個生日/紀念日怎麼過，以及送給對方什麼禮物。這事兒可能要花上幾星期、甚至幾個月來完成。

Have you ever thought how you can magically sweep your partner off their feet with a fractionof that effort on an ordinary day?

不過，你有沒有想過在一個平凡的日子裏，突然給對方一個大驚喜呢?

Nothing works like giving tiny, simple – and most importantly, unexpected – surprises to eachother in keeping the air of freshness and novelty in your relationship。

若想幫助情感保鮮，沒什麼比送給對方一個出其不意又意義重大的小禮物更好的辦法了。

　　2. Romantic texts

發浪漫短信

A great thing about those “I miss you kitten” texts you used to send each other in the initialdays of your relationship is the juvenile excitement in them。

我們在戀愛初期，之所以鍾情於互發“想你啦，寶貝”之類的短信，是因爲它能帶給我們一種青澀的甜蜜。

You need that back right now. OK, it may not be 10 times a day like back then – but can youtext him/her randomly, suddenly and romantically on some random ordinary day?

現在的你們也需要它。沒必要像以前那樣，一發就十幾條，但你也可以在平日裏偶爾“肉麻”一下嘛。

The smile it brings on their lips will spread its glow for quite some time in your relationship –until the next time you do the same, that is。

當你的愛人看到短信，他們不自覺的微笑將蔓延開來，爲你們的感情增添一道明亮色彩。如此反覆，愛將日益堅固。

　　3. What happened to dating?

不如來次約會?

I confess – my husband and I haven’t actually gotten around to doing this yet. But the humanmind works on associations, and fixing up a date on a cool Friday evening with your partner willbring all those flutters of your dating days back into your systems。

我得先坦白一下，我和我老公還沒試過這招。但是人的腦子是會主動聯想的。如果你們相約在某個美好的週五晚上外[微博]出約會，那麼，那些舊時光裏的浪漫記憶都將涌上心頭，讓你們重溫美好。

Well if not all, then some. And that will go much beyond that one evening, reminding each ofyou once again of how exciting, romantic and special a person the other is。

好吧，也可能涌上來的只是“部分”，反正好歹也是記憶重現了嘛。重要的是，這次約會將讓你們想起以前會面時彼此是多麼激動、感覺是多麼特別、以及面前的這位愛人，對自己而言是多麼的重要。

　　4. If you admire them, let them know

欣賞ta，就要告訴ta

There are some qualities that each of our significant other possesses which made them feelspecial to us in the first place。

每個人所珍愛的那一位，一定都有一些特殊的品質讓你珍視，反之亦然。

What is it in yours that blew you off? Was it beauty? Intelligence? Verve? Ability to hold aconversation?

那麼，你的愛人，有哪些能把你迷倒的閃光點呢?是美貌?智慧?魄力?還是優異的社交能力?

Whatever it is, it’s still there, and if you’re reading this you still admire it. Now all you have to dois let them know from time to time. If you place yourself in their shoes you’ll probably know howhappy it makes someone to know they’re still valued and special to their partner。

無論是哪樣，它如今依然存在，且假如你已經耐心地讀到了這裏，就說明你仍然欣賞伴侶的優秀。現在你要做的，僅僅是確保能時常提起你對他的讚美和欣賞。將心比心很重要，當你設身處地從別人角度考慮的話，便能發現被欣賞、被重視是多麼快樂的一件事。

　　5. Find a little joint project

一起做一件小項目

A baby brings couples closer because it gives them something common to care for other thanjust each other。

一個孩子能讓伴侶間跟親密，因爲它讓人們不僅關心彼此，更學會了共同去關心別人。

A joint project or a common hobby is not so different. It’s something that’s important to bothof you and hence helps strengthen your bond。

同理，一個需共同參與的項目，或一個相同的愛好也是一樣。因爲它對你們兩人來說都很重要，從而加強了你們的聯繫。

　　6. When chatting is a to-do

避免讓聊天模式化

Do you have common topics of interest? Like music/movies/politics? If not, create them,because you need them。

你們有共同的話題或興趣嗎?比如音樂、電影、政治?如果沒有，那就去挖掘，因爲你們需要共同興趣點。

Nothing gives boredom a more permanent seat at your dinner table than limiting yourself tothose married-people-dialogues (“pass me the sauce”， “we need to buy bread”， “the carneeds servicing”)。

已婚夫婦在餐桌上的常見對話“把調料遞給我”、“我們該買麪包了”、“家裏的車該保養了”……沒什麼比這些話題更無聊了。

Actively engage in meaningful and fulfilling discussions on any topic that interests both of husband and I enjoy this little sport like anything (Disclaimer: it gets a bit too competitiveat times。

不如積極一點，參與那些你們都喜歡的、充滿意義的話題或活動吧。我和我老公就有共同喜歡的運動，而且，有時候我們還會相互競爭呢。