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爆笑英语小笑话大全

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笑话作为一种城市化的民间口头创作体裁,是一种重要的交际手段。小编精心收集了爆笑英语小笑话,供大家欣赏学习!

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  爆笑英语小笑话篇1

A teacher said to herclass:”Who was the first man?”

一个老师问她的学生:“谁是世界上第一个男人”

“George Washington,” a little boy shouted promptly.

一个小男孩立刻大声说:“乔治.华盛顿。”

“How do you make outthat George Washington was the first man?”asked theteacher,smiling indulgently.

老师带着宠溺的笑容问这个男生:“你如何证明乔治华盛顿是世界上第一个男人呢。”

“Because,” said thelittle boy, “he was first in war, first in peace, and first in the hearts ofhis countrymen.”

这个男孩子说:“因为,他是第一个挑起战争,第一个主张和平,并且是第一个深得民心的人。”

But at this point a largerboy held up his hand. “Well,” said the teacher to him, “who do you think wasthe first man?”

这时,有一个年龄稍大的男孩子举起手来,老师问他,“你认为谁是世界第一个男人?”

“I don’t know whathis name was, ” said the larger boy, “but I know it wasn’t George Washington,ma’am, because the history book says George Washington married a widow, so, ofcourse, there must have been a man ahead of him.”

男孩回答说:“我不知道他的名字,但是我肯定他不是乔治华盛顿,因为历史书上说,乔治华盛顿和一个寡妇结婚了,所以在他之前,当然还有一个男的啦。”

  爆笑英语小笑话篇2

A Georgia Congressman was seated next to a little girl on the airplane leaving from Atlanta when he turned to her and said,

'Let's talk. I've heard that flights go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger.'

The little girl, who had just opened her book, closed it slowly and said to the total stranger,

'What would you like to talk about?'

'Oh, I don't know,' said the southern congressman.

'How about global warming or universal health care', and he smiles smugly.

'OK, ' she said. 'Those could be interesting topics. But let me ask you a question first. A horse, a cow, and a deer all eat the same stuff - grass. Yet a deer excretes little pellets, while a cow turns out a flat patty, and a horse produces clumps of dried grass. Why do you suppose that is?'

The southern legislator, visibly surprised by the little girl's intelligence, thinks about it and says,

'Hmmm, I have no idea.'

To which the little girl replies, 'Do you really feel qualified to discuss global warming or universal health care when you don't know shit?

  爆笑英语小笑话篇3

One day, a father and his little son were going home. At this age, the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. Now, he asked, "What's the meaning of the word 'Drunk', dad?" "Well, my son," his father replied, "look, there are standing two policemen. If I regard the two policemen as four then I am drunk."

一天,父亲与小儿子一道回家。这个孩子正处于那种对什么事都很感兴趣的年龄,老是有提不完的问题。他向父亲发问道:“爸爸,‘醉’字是什么意思?” “唔,孩子,”父亲回答说,“你瞧那儿站着两个警察。如果我把他们看成了四个,那么我就算醉了。”

"But, dad," the boy said, " there's only ONE policeman!"

“可是,爸爸, ”孩子说,“那儿只有一个警察呀!”


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