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經典英文笑話短文閱讀

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民間笑話是一種頗受人們喜愛的民間敘事類型,材料豐富,有廣泛的現實基礎。本站小編整理了經典英文笑話短文,歡迎閱讀!

經典英文笑話短文閱讀
  經典英文笑話短文篇一

獨特的考試形式

州立教授給學生判分是有名的好好先生,他每門課的成績只根據兩次考試的結果,而考試內容全在課本里。由於這樣的名聲在外,每學期都有一大批學生不怎麼來上課,或者根本不來上課只有考試的時候才露下面。有一學期,差不多有一半的學生直到考試連一堂課都沒來聽過。考第一場那天,學生們坐在那兒,一位助教發了卷子並解釋說:“教授病了,我來監考。”打開卷子,只有一道題。題目列出了20幅教師的照片,要求是,在教這門課的教授的照片上劃圈。

A professor was known for being a generous marker. The grades he gave for one of his courses were based solely on two exams,and the stuff on the exams was covered entirely in the textbook. As word of the course spread,each term there was a large group of students who turned up infrequently,or not at all,just showing up for the exams. Finally, it got so bad that one term,about half of the students never turned up at all until the exams. On the day of first exam,the students sat down and a graduate assistant handed out the papers, explaining,"The professor is ill,so I’II be taking the exams.”When they opened the booklet,the students discovered just one question. It listed twenty grainy staff photos,and the instructions read,"Circle the picture of the professor who teaches this course.”

  經典英文笑話短文篇二

哪個女人結婚了

A little boy is in school working on his arithmetic. The teacher says,“Imagine there are five blackbirds sitting on a fence. You pick up your gun and shoot one. How many blackbirds are left”

一個小男孩在上算術課。老師問他:“假設籬笆上站着5只畫眉。你用槍打死了一隻,還剩幾隻?”

The litter boy thinks for a moment and says“None !”

小男孩想了一會回答說:“一隻也沒有了!

The teacher replies,“None,how do youfigure that?”

老師說:“一隻也沒了?你是怎麼想出來的?”

The little boy says,“If I shoot one,all the other birds will fly away scared,leaving none on the fence.”

小男孩答道:“打死一隻,其他的都嚇飛了,籬笆上自然一隻畫眉也沒有了。”

The teacher replies,"Hmmmmm, not exactly,but I do like the way you think"

老師讚許地說:“嗯,不全對,但我欣賞你思考問題的方式!”

The little boy then says,"Teacher, can I ask you a question?There are three women sitting on a park bench eating ice cream cones. One is licking her cone,another is biting it, and the third one is sucking can you tell me which one of the women is married?”

小男孩於是說:“老師,我能問你一個問題嗎?有三個婦女坐在公園的長椅上吃甜筒冰激凌。一個用舌頭舔,一個用牙咬,一個用嘴吸,你說她們中哪一個結婚了?”

The teacher ponders the question uncomfortably and then finally replies,"Well,I guess the one sucking her cone.”

老師感到很不自在,他想了很大一會兒,最後回答說:“嗯,我猜應該是那個用嘴吸的吧。”

To which the little boy replies,“Actually,it’s the one with the wedding ring,but I do like the way you think”

聽了老師的話,小男孩說:“答案是那個戴戒指的,雖然你答錯了,但是我真的很欣賞您思考問題的方式。”

  經典英文笑話短文篇三

解答難題

One day,the teacher walked into her classroom and announced to the class that on each Friday,she will ask a question of the class and anyone who answers correctly doesn't have to go to school the following Monday.

老師走進教室,向同學們宣佈說,以後每星期五她都會問大家一個問題,誰答對了下星期一就不用上課。

One the first Friday,the teacher asked,"how many grains of sand are there on the beach?”Needless to say,no one could following Friday, the teacher asks the class,“How many stars are there in the sky?”and no one could answer.

第一個星期五,老師問:“沙灘上有多少粒沙子?”不用說,沒人答得上來。第二個星期五,老師問:‘天上有多少顆星星?”還是沒人答得上來。

Frustrated,little Johnny decided that the next Friday,he would somehow answer the question and get a three-day weekend. So on Thursday night, Johnny took two ping一gong balls and painted them black. The next day, he brought them to school in a paper bag. At the end of the day,just when the teacher said,"here’s this weekend’s question,"Johnny emptied the bag to floor,sending the ping一pong balls rolling to the front of the room.

小強尼沮喪極了,他決定下星期五設法回答出老師的問題,過一次連續三天的週末。星期四晚上,強尼找了兩個乒乓球,並把它們染成黑色。第二天,他把乒乓球裝在了一個紙袋裏帶到了學校。這一天的課快結束的時候,老師說:“這一星期的問題是—”話還沒說完,強尼就把乒乓球從紙袋裏倒出來,把它們滾向講臺。

Because they were young kids who find any disruption of class amusingthe entire class started teacher said,"OK,who's the comedian with the black balls?"Immediately,little Johnny stood up and said,"Johnny Henry,see you on Tuesday”

小孩子嘛,只要能打斷老師的講課,他們都會覺得好玩,於是全班鬨堂大笑。老師問:“這些黑球是哪個搗蛋鬼的?”小強尼立刻站起來說:“是強尼·亨尼的,我答出來了,下星期二見!”


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