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爆笑英語小笑話大全

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笑話作爲一種城市化的民間口頭創作體裁,是一種重要的交際手段。小編精心收集了爆笑英語小笑話,供大家欣賞學習!

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  爆笑英語小笑話篇1

A teacher said to herclass:”Who was the first man?”

一個老師問她的學生:“誰是世界上第一個男人”

“George Washington,” a little boy shouted promptly.

一個小男孩立刻大聲說:“喬治.華盛頓。”

“How do you make outthat George Washington was the first man?”asked theteacher,smiling indulgently.

老師帶着寵溺的笑容問這個男生:“你如何證明喬治華盛頓是世界上第一個男人呢。”

“Because,” said thelittle boy, “he was first in war, first in peace, and first in the hearts ofhis countrymen.”

這個男孩子說:“因爲,他是第一個挑起戰爭,第一個主張和平,並且是第一個深得民心的人。”

But at this point a largerboy held up his hand. “Well,” said the teacher to him, “who do you think wasthe first man?”

這時,有一個年齡稍大的男孩子舉起手來,老師問他,“你認爲誰是世界第一個男人?”

“I don’t know whathis name was, ” said the larger boy, “but I know it wasn’t George Washington,ma’am, because the history book says George Washington married a widow, so, ofcourse, there must have been a man ahead of him.”

男孩回答說:“我不知道他的名字,但是我肯定他不是喬治華盛頓,因爲歷史書上說,喬治華盛頓和一個寡婦結婚了,所以在他之前,當然還有一個男的啦。”

  爆笑英語小笑話篇2

A Georgia Congressman was seated next to a little girl on the airplane leaving from Atlanta when he turned to her and said,

'Let's talk. I've heard that flights go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger.'

The little girl, who had just opened her book, closed it slowly and said to the total stranger,

'What would you like to talk about?'

'Oh, I don't know,' said the southern congressman.

'How about global warming or universal health care', and he smiles smugly.

'OK, ' she said. 'Those could be interesting topics. But let me ask you a question first. A horse, a cow, and a deer all eat the same stuff - grass. Yet a deer excretes little pellets, while a cow turns out a flat patty, and a horse produces clumps of dried grass. Why do you suppose that is?'

The southern legislator, visibly surprised by the little girl's intelligence, thinks about it and says,

'Hmmm, I have no idea.'

To which the little girl replies, 'Do you really feel qualified to discuss global warming or universal health care when you don't know shit?

  爆笑英語小笑話篇3

One day, a father and his little son were going home. At this age, the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. Now, he asked, "What's the meaning of the word 'Drunk', dad?" "Well, my son," his father replied, "look, there are standing two policemen. If I regard the two policemen as four then I am drunk."

一天,父親與小兒子一道回家。這個孩子正處於那種對什麼事都很感興趣的年齡,老是有提不完的問題。他向父親發問道:“爸爸,‘醉’字是什麼意思?” “唔,孩子,”父親回答說,“你瞧那兒站着兩個警察。如果我把他們看成了四個,那麼我就算醉了。”

"But, dad," the boy said, " there's only ONE policeman!"

“可是,爸爸, ”孩子說,“那兒只有一個警察呀!”


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