聖誕節英語笑話四則

在日常繁忙的生活中，也不要忘了放鬆自己的心情。下面是本站小編爲大家帶來聖誕節英語笑話四則，希望大家喜歡!

　聖誕節英語笑話：好燈

A customer walked into our store looking for Christmas lights. I showed her our top brand, but—wanting to make sure each bulb worked—she asked me to take them out of the box and plug them in. I did, and each one lit up. "Great," she said. I carefully placed the string of lights back in the box. But as I handed them to her, she looked alarmed. "I don’t want this box," she said abruptly. "It’s been opened."

一位顧客進我們的商店買聖誕燈。我給她看了我們店裏最好的牌子，但還需確認一下燈泡是否正常。她讓我把燈泡從盒子裏拿出來，然後通上電。我照做了。每一個燈泡都是正常的。她說:“非常好。”我小心翼翼地把這串聖誕燈放回盒子裏。可當我把這一盒燈泡交給她時，她吃驚地看着我，突然說：“我不要這一盒，它打開過的。”

聖誕節英語笑話：上天堂

Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates.

三名男子都死於平安夜，而後分別在天堂之門被聖彼得召見。

"In honor of this holy season," Saint Peter said, "You must each possess something that symbolizes Christmas to get into heaven."

聖彼得說：“因爲這個神聖的節日，你們每個人都必須有象徵聖誕節的物品才能進入天堂”。

The first man fumbled through his pockets and pulled out a lighter. He flicked it on. "It represents a candle," he said. "You may pass through the pearly gates," Saint Peter said.

第一名男子從他得口袋裏掏出了個打火機，他打燃打火機說：“它代表蠟燭”。於是聖彼得就讓他進入了天堂。

The second man reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of keys. He shook them and said, "They're bells." Saint Peter said, "You may pass through the pearly gates."

第二個男子從口袋裏掏出一串鑰匙，他把鑰匙在手裏搖了搖說：“它們是鈴鐺”聖誕老人也讓他上了天堂。

The third man started searching desperately through his pockets and finally pulled out a pair of women's glasses.

第三個男子絕望的在口袋裏掏了半天，最後掏出了一副女人的眼鏡。

St. Peter looked at the man with a raised eyebrow and asked, "And just what do those symbolize?"

聖彼得挑了挑眉，看向這個男的，說：“你倒是說說這玩意兒代表什麼?”

The man replied, "They're Carol's."

男士答到：“她們是卡羅爾的”

　聖誕節英語笑話：聖誕禮物

A guy bought his wife a beautiful diamond ring for Christmas.

聖誕節來了，一位先生給他太太送的聖誕禮物是一個非常漂亮的鑽石戒子。

After hearing about this extravagant gift, a friend of his said, "I thought she wanted one of those sporty four-wheel-drive vehicles."

他朋友聽到他買這麼奢侈的禮物後，說到：“她不是想要輛四驅車嗎”。

"She did," he replied. "But where was I going to find a fake Jeep?"

先生答：“是啊，(可以買到假鑽石)，可去哪裏能買一輛假吉普車呢?”

聖誕節英語笑話：聖誕節晚宴上的餐前禱告

Lee, A seven-year-old boy, was asked to say thanks for the Christmas dinner. The family members bowed their heads in expectation. Lee began his prayer, thanking God for his Mommy, Daddy, brothers, sister, Grandma, and all his aunts and uncles. Then he began to thank God for the food.

有個小男孩叫Lee, 今年七歲，聖誕節晚餐開桌前，家人讓他做餐前禱告。家人都帶着期待的申請低頭看着他，Lee開始做他得禱告，首先，他謝謝上帝賜予他爸爸媽媽，哥哥姐姐誒，奶奶還有他們家的所有叔叔嬸嬸。然後，他開始感謝上帝賜予他得聖誕節晚餐了。

He gave thanks for the turkey, the stuffing, the Christmas pudding, even the cranberry sauce. Then lee paused, and everyone waited ... and waited. After a long silence, the young fellow looked up at his mother and asked, "If I thank God for the Brussels sprouts, won't he know that I'm lying?"

他感謝上帝賜予他火雞，餡兒餅，聖誕布丁和紅莓醬。然後Lee停下來了 ，大家等啊等啊。。。。Lee沉默了很長時間，然後擡起頭看着他媽媽說：“媽媽，如果我感謝上帝賜予我甘藍菜，他會知道我在撒謊嗎?”