有關聖誕節的英語笑話
The thief and the judge
It was Christmas and the judge was in a benevolent mood as he questioned the prisoner. "What are you charged with?" he asked.
"Doing my christmas shopping early," replied the defendant.
"That's no offense," replied the judge, "How early were you doing this shopping?"
"Before the store opened," countered the prisoner.
法官與小偷
那天是聖誕節，法官在審訊犯人時也有點惻隱之心。“你爲什麼而被起訴？”他問。
“採購聖誕節物品過早。”被告答。
“這不算犯法，”法官回答，“你購物多早？”
在商店開門之前，“犯人應道。Jesus's Telly
A child on Christmas time asked for some paper and crayons in order to draw a crib. Eventually the artistic masterpiece was displayed for parental approval. The manager, the shepherds, Jesus and Holy Family wore duly admired.
"But what's that in the corner?" asked Mother.
"Oh, that's their telly," replied the tot.
耶穌的電視機
聖誕節時孩子要了紙和蠟筆，想畫一張耶穌誕生像。最後這件藝術品被陳列出來供父母鑑賞。
他們對耶穌誕生後睡的馬槽，牧羊人，耶穌及其家庭都逐一表示讚賞。
“可是那個角落裏是什麼？”媽媽問。
“噢，那是他們的電視機，”孩子回答說。What does Santa Claus like to do in his garden?
Answer: he likes to hoe, hoe, hoe
聖誕老人喜歡在花園裏做什麼？
答案：鋤地。（英文裏Hoe 和ho同音。hoe是鋤草之意，ho則是聖誕老人的笑聲。）On Christmas Eve Santa Claus met an honest politician and a kind lawyer while riding up in an elevator of a very exclusive hotel. Just before the doors opened the three of them noticed a 1000NT bill lying on the floor. Which one of them do you think picked it up?
Answer: Santa of course! Why? Because everybody knows that the other two don’t exist!
聖誕節前夕，聖誕老人和一清廉的政治人物，以及一心地善良的律師在一家高級飯店一同等電梯，門還未開前，三人同時看到地上有一張新臺幣1000元的鈔票，猜猜誰會將它撿起？
答案：當然是聖誕老人啦！爲什麼？因爲大家都知道另外兩者並不存在。
