人生智慧:老爸教給我的18個人生信條(上)

Even though my dad’s advice is relevant to a person of any age, my 29-year-old self can relate to it in a way my 14-year-old self didn’t quite grasp at the time. In fact, the first thought that went through my head was, “My dad was right.”Here are his 18 pieces of advice for a younger generation, transcribed with his permission.

老爸的建議適用於各個年齡段，正如現在29歲的我終於領悟了14歲時並不能理解的精妙。當我重讀時，腦中的第一閃念就是：“爸爸是對的！”以下即是在老爸的許可下轉錄其對年輕一代的18條建議。

1.Your 30’s, 40’s and 50’s won’t feel like your 30’s, 40’s and 50’s. – Adults are just older children. When you get older you won’t feel as old as you imagine you will. For the most part, you still feel exactly the way you feel right now, just a little wiser and more confident. You’ve had time to establish your place in the world and figure out what’s important to you. Don’t fear growing up. Look forward to it. It’s awesome.
當你三、四、五十歲的時候不要讓你看起來就是三、四、五十歲。成人只是年長的孩子。隨着年齡的增長，不要使你自己有想象中的蒼老感覺。在極大程度上，你還是依然如故，只不過多了智慧和更加的自信。你已經確立了在自己的位置，並且清楚什麼於你是重要的。所以，不要對成長畏懼而要懷有期待，這是很了不起的。

2.Bad things will happen to you and your friends. – Part of living and growing up is experiencing unexpected troubles in life. People lose jobs, get in car accidents and sometimes die. When you are younger, and things are going pretty well, this harsh reality can be hard to visualize. The smartest, and oftentimes hardest, thing we can do in these kinds of situations is to be tempered in our reactions. To want to scream obscenities, but to wiser and more disciplined than that. To remember that emotional rage only makes matters worse. And to remember that tragedies are rarely as bad as they seem, and even when they are, they give us an opportunity to grow stronger.
壞事也有找上門的可能。經歷生命中的意外麻煩其實是生活和成長的一部分。人們可能會失業、遭遇車禍甚至死亡。當你還年幼，相信一切還都很美好，是很難想象到嚴酷的現實的。然而在這些遭遇面前，我們所能做的最小的也通常是最難的事情就是適應。想要張狂地尖叫，但是智慧和自律總會將之代替。要記住過於情緒化的憤怒會讓事情變得更糟。也要記住悲劇很少會像它們看起來那麼悲慘，同時，就算它們悲慘如斯，也恰好給了我們變強壯的機會。

3.Everyone can make a huge difference. – Making one person smile can change the world. Maybe not the whole world, but their world. So start small and start now.
每個人都可以與衆不同。讓一個人微笑可以改變一個世界。也許不是整個世界，但卻是他自己的世界。所以就從小事從現在做起吧。

4.First impressions aren’t all they’re cracked up to be. – Everyone and everything seems normal from a distance, or at a glance. The 10th, 20th, or even the 50th impression is when you start to truly understand someone else for who they truly are.
第一印象並非完全可信。任何人和任何事從一定距離或者僅一瞥中看總是正常。但你的第10次、20次甚至50次的印象才能使你真正地去理解真實的他人。

5.Big results come when you narrow your focus. – Concentrate your efforts on smaller and smaller areas. When your efforts are diffused over a wide area they won’t have much of an impact. So focus on smaller areas and your efforts will be felt more fully. It could take time for change to happen, but keep that focus narrow.
集中精力時總會有大收穫。將你的努力集中於越來越小的領域。當你在一個寬廣的領域分散你的努力時，其實並不能取得良好的效果。所以專心致志可以讓你的努力更有成效。也許改變需要時間，但是做事請專心。

6.Love yourself. Become your own priority. – Strive to be the ‘you’ you want to be. Nourish your mind and body. Educate yourself every day until you die.
愛自己。做自己的主導。爲你想成爲的人而奮鬥。充實心靈，強健體魄。做到活到老學到老。

7.Sometimes you just have to go for it. – Put your uncertainty and fears aside for a second and ask yourself this: “If I try and I don’t get it right the first time, what will I have lost and what will I have gained?” The answer is: You will have lost nothing but a little bit of your time while gaining an important lesson that will help you get it right the second or third time. People rarely get it right the first time. In fact, usually the only people who ever get it right are those who continue going for it even when they’ve come up short numerous times before.
有時候就是要堅持到底。先把你的猶豫和畏懼放到一邊，然後問自己：“如果我努力去做，但是在第一次恰好沒有成功。那麼，我將會失去什麼，同時又會得到什麼？”答案是：除了一點點的時間你其實毫無損失，但同時你卻獲得了一個重要的經驗或者教訓，這會助你在下一次或者再一次的努力中獲得成功。很少有人一下子就能成功。實際上，在很多人看似輕鬆成功的背後，總有無數次的嘗試和努力。

8.In order to get, you have to give. – Supporting, guiding and making contributions to other people is one of life’s greatest rewards. Everything you do comes back around.
要想得到，必先付出。支持、引導以及奉獻他人是人生中最大的嘉獎之一。你所做的事情都會有所回報的。

9.Not much is worth fighting about. – If you can avoid it, don’t fight. Step back from arguments with your spouse, family members or neighbors. When you feel anger surging up and you want to yell that vulgar remark on tip of your tongue, just close your mouth and walk away. Let yourself calm down. You don’t have to be right or win an argument. It just doesn’t matter.
很多事情並不值得爭吵。如果可以，就儘量避免爭吵，特別是與配偶、家人以及鄰居的吵鬧。當你感到怒不可遏，並且粗話張口即出的時候，請不要說話並且走開讓自己冷靜下來。沒有必要一定證明自己是對的或者去贏得一場爭吵，其實這些並不重要。