英語小故事 幽默

英語幽默故事簡短，內容詼諧幽默，情節生動有趣。今天小編整理了一些英語小故事，希望對大家喜歡。

　英語幽默故事：漫無邊際的菜單

A man dirning with a friend explained the peculiarities of the restaurant they were in:"The waiters never admit they don't have something. They'll take your order. for a slice of sun and too away as if they mean to get they'll come back and say they just ran out.”

一位和朋友吃飯的男士解釋他們在飯館裏吃飯的怪現象時說:“服務員從未承認過他們沒有什麼萊。假如你想要一份太陽，他們也會拿着菜單離去，好像真能給你弄來似的。然後，他們回來說這道菜剛賣完。”爲了證明這一點，我說:“請來一份恐龍。”

To prove his point，he said to the waiter,“The dinosaur，please.”

“好的，先生，”服務員回答說:“您要的恐龍是做得嫩點還是老點兒的?”

“Yes，sir，“answered the waiter.”And how would you like it cooked?"

“老點兒的。”

英語幽默故事：善解人意

I had iust learned to drive and, like most teen-agers，begged at every opportunity to take over the wheel. During a family vacation my father finally allowed me drive on a long，straight stretch on highway.I was in my glory until there was a sudden turn in the ht unaware, I swung too wide and ran into a service station's advertising sign. I stopped the cat and waited for a lecture.

像大多數的青少年一樣，我剛學會開車時，總想利用一切開車的機會。有一次家庭外出度假時，我經過請求，爸爸終於允許我在筆直的高速公路止駕駛。我感到十分榮幸，直到開到了一個急轉彎，由於轉盤轉動得太大，車直奔着加油站的廣告牌衝去。我停下了車，等着挨訓。

My father，always considerate of his children's feelings，turned back to the rest of family and said. "As long as we're here,does anyone need to use the rest room?"

我的父親總是考慮到孩子喲情緒，轉過身對家裏的其他人說:“既然我們已經把車開到了這兒，有人想上廁所嗎?”

英語幽默故事：一物降一物

"It's annoying when my dentist starts up a conversation while he's working on my teeth，"one guy said to another.

一個人對另一個人說:“當我的牙醫陪我看牙時，他總是跟我聊天。這真讓我心煩。”

"I know just what you mean，”replied his friend. "But my Uncle Edgar used to drive this dentist crazy.'

他的朋友回答說:“我明白你的意思，但我的叔叔艾德加就曾使這位牙醫不知所措。”

"How so?""He was a ventriloquist."

“怎麼會這樣呢?”“他是個口技演員。”

　　英語幽默故事：狼的故事

After two sleepless nights in a noisy campground，my wife and I were dreading another evening of radios and singslongs. Then a middle-aged couple pulled into the space beside us. While the wife prepared dinner，her husband mounted two huge loud speakers on the roof of their camper. We crouched by our fire,waiting for the first blast of whatever these people considered music. To our surprise,the speakers remained silent，and just as the partiers were getting into full swing，our neighbors retired for the evening. We decided to do the same，although there seemed little chance of sleeping.

吵鬧的宿營地使我和我老婆兩個晚上都無法入睡。我們真擔心第三個晚上的收音機聲和唱歌聲。接着，一對中年夫婦又在我們的附近找到了塊兒地方呆了下來。女的做飯時，男的在他的帳頂上架起兩個擴音器。我們圍火而坐，等待着音樂一響出現的第一次喧鬧。出乎我們的意料，擴音器沒有任何聲響。正當參加舞會的人進入高潮時，我們的這兩位鄰居已開始休息了。雖然我們睡意還未到，我們還是決定睡覺。

As our tent was throbbing to a rock number，a low moan became audible，developing into an unmistakable wolf howl. It was soon joined by others in rising and falling harmonies. After reaching peak volume，the wild chorus faded quickly to utter silence. The campground was deathly quiet for what seemed like ages，and then a deep but pleasant voice said，"Relax，folks，it's just a recording. Good night."

我們的帳篷隨着搖滾樂在顫動，這時好像還伴隨着嗚咽聲，靳漸地這種叫聲已無疑地變成了兒狼嚎。這種狼嚎聲很快又摻進了其他的此起彼伏的和絃，一直到了極點。之後這種瘋狂的叫喊聲剎然而止，整個營地好像度過了幾個時代的死一般的寂靜後，一個深沉而又悅耳的聲音傳了出來:“各位，別緊張，這只是錄音，晚安。”