我的女兒已長大成人,她不交租金住在我家,也不想工作
I have two sons and a daughter, and the latter has always been the baby of the family. My sons left school at 18 and got jobs, worked hard, saved up and got their own flats with their girlfriends. My daughter, however, is 25 and has never worked.
我有兩個兒子、一個女兒，後者一直是家裏的寵兒。兩個兒子18歲時畢業、之後努力工作、存錢、和女朋友住在自己的公寓裏。然而我的女兒已經25歲了，但她卻從沒上過班。After school she went to university and then after that she went travelling with friends. She came home and worked in a coffee shop for a while before going off travelling again. She then decided she wanted to train to become a beauty therapist so my husband and I paid for all the equipment she needed and for her training.
高中畢業後，她上了大學，大學畢業後，她和朋友四處旅行。然後她回來了、在咖啡館工作了一段時間，又出去旅行了。之後，她決定訓練成爲一名美容治療師，所以我和丈夫給她買了她需要的設備，並花錢供她培訓。She's a couple of months away from finishing her course and now she's decided she doesn't want to be a beauty therapist after all. My husband is furious with her, and with me, because he thinks she's spoilt and just needs to knuckle down and get a job like everybody else.
還有幾個月她就學成了，但她卻決定不想成爲美容治療師了。我的丈夫十分生氣（既生女兒的氣也生我的氣），因爲他覺得女兒被寵壞了，需要認真工作，像所有人一樣。
She lives at home rent free and we pay for everything. If I ask her what she plans to do with her life she gets upset and then I feel bad. But she's 26 this summer and she's never had a proper job. What advice do you have?
她住在家裏，也不交租金，一切都是我們爲她買單。如果我問她打算將來怎麼辦，她就會變得沮喪，讓我感到內疚。但今年夏天她就26歲了，還沒有過正經工作。您有什麼建議呢？
Coleen says
科琳說I can understand your husband is peeved, but isn't he at least partly responsible for spoiling her? Firstly, where did she get the money from to go travelling? Either you and your husband must have been paying or she was using her coffee-shop money and you were topping it up.
我可以理解你的丈夫十分氣惱，但女兒被寵壞了，他也得負一部分責任吧？首先，她旅遊的錢打哪兒來的？要麼是你，要麼就是你丈夫給的，或者是她從咖啡館掙來的錢，然後你們還額外給她錢。If she still wants to go travelling, fine, but she ought to get a job, save up and pay for it herself like other 25-year-olds.
如果她還是想出去旅遊，那麼沒問題，但她應該找個工作、省錢、自己出錢旅行，這纔是25歲的人該做的事。You need to stop feeling bad about asking her what she plans to do with her life because you have every right to do so if you're letting her live rent free in your home at her age. It's not like she's 18 and a few months out of school.
詢問她關於未來生活的計劃時不要感到內疚，因爲如果你讓她在這個歲數不交錢就住在你家，那你就有權利這樣做。畢竟她又不是18歲，即將畢業的小姑娘。The situation isn't fair on her brothers either, who you may find resent her - and you - a little for allowing this situation to continue. They've had to work hard and pay their own way through life, so why shouldn't their sister?
這對她的哥哥們也不公平，他們可能會有點憎恨她--也恨你--如果這種情況繼續下去的話。他們必須努力工作、爲自己買單，但爲什麼妹妹就不用呢？
