他她話題:如果穿越到古代,你還敢私奔嗎?
“Elopement” is a term or an event with some sort of mysteriousness. In China, stories about runaway lovers are quite a lot. Some may wonder, what eventually happened to the runaway lovers, or if there were happy endings to those brave lovers.
“私奔”總是個神祕的話題。在中國，也有很多關於私奔的故事。你也許會好奇：私奔最終會有怎樣的結局，那些勇敢的情侶們會有個圓滿的結局嗎？
In ancient China, elopement mainly referred to the act of running away with one’s beloved. The lovers, usually not able to gain approval of marriage from parents, had to resort to a secret runaway. Mostly the female lover would follow her beloved male lover.
在古代中國，私奔是指和所愛的人一起逃跑。情侶們的婚姻得不到父母的支持，不得不選擇祕密逃跑。通常，是女方跟隨男方逃跑。
In fact, “elopement” seldom happened in ordinary households. In the rich or official families, as the young generation received a relatively higher education, there were cases of young lovers going against their parents’ wish and running away for marriage freedom. However, as the act did not accord with the value of “arranging a match by parents’ order and on the matchmaker’s word” which was much advocated by the feudal ethics, not many stories of runaway lovers have been handed down.
事實上，在普通家庭中，私奔是很少發生的。在一些權貴家庭，年輕一代所接受的教育水平比較高，容易背離父母一輩的期望，爲了婚姻自由而私奔。但是由於私奔的行爲不符合“父母之命，媒妁之言”的封建傳統價值觀，流傳下來的關於私奔的故事相當之少。
Among the numbered cases, the romance of Sima Xiangru and Zhuo Wenjun is the most renowned one, and also one of the rare successes. Sima Xiangru was a poor lad from obscure background, in modern words, he was the one “without house, without car, without money and without card。” Yet by pure chance he moved Zhuo Wenjun, a lady from a rich family, with a guqin-accompanied song, The Male Phoenix Seeks His Mate. After the two eloped, Sima Xiangru was still the same talented scholar with little wealth, and Zhuo Wenjun had to sell liquor in the market despite her eminent family background, turning herself into a peddler – as modern people put it. Fortunately, both of them cherished their hard-earned relation, so the ending was generally happy. Yet judging from the long history, more of the eloping girls did not end so well: a lot becoming one of the many concubines, feeling depressed; and some being cheated, deserted by their beloved in the end.
在屈指可數的案例中，司馬相如和卓文君的愛情故事最爲著名，也是極少數獲得成功的案例之一。司馬相如出身平庸，用現在的話說就是“無房無車無沒錢沒卡”一族。但是他居然用一曲古琴《鳳求凰》打動了富家小姐卓文君。兩個人私奔後，司馬相如仍然是個一貧如洗的窮書生，而卓文君不得不由富家千金淪爲買酒小販。幸運的是，兩個人都很珍惜這段來之不易的感情，所以故事有一個不錯的結局。但是，如果縱觀歷史，更多女子在私奔後的結局都沒有這麼美好：很多淪爲小妾，鬱郁終生，還有些甚至被出軌的愛人所拋棄。
The ancient Chinese society had a severe punishment for those “eloping” lovers. If a man was caught eloping, his name would be removed from the family temple, his land be confiscated, and his body tied to a door plank, beaten by stick until he was severely hurt or even dead; the girl would be either forced to go home or drowned in the well. If the girl was born in a more prominent family, the poor lad would be evicted out of the family’s sphere of influence. No matter the eloper was man or woman, the family of the elopers would feel unable to “hold up their heads” in their living circle.
古代中國社會對私奔的情侶有一種嚴厲的懲罰。如果男子私奔被捉到，他會被從家廟中除名，擁有的土地被沒收，而人則會被綁在門板上用木棍抽打直至重傷甚至死去。女子如果私奔被捉，或者是被休回家，或者被扔到井裏淹死。如果女子出生名門，她則會被驅逐出家族的勢力範圍。不管私奔的是男子還是女子，家裏人都會因此在鄰里中“擡不起頭”。
