辦公室戀情到底關不關老闆的事

Dear Annie: I will be a senior in the fall and just started a summer internship at a major financial services company, and something has come up that seems strange to me. A manager in the human resources department called me into her office and gave me a document to sign that said (among other things) that my relationship with my boyfriend is "voluntary."

親愛的安妮：今年秋年，我就要進入大學四年級，最近在一家大型金融服務類公司開始暑期實習。可我在這裏經歷了一件奇怪的事情。一名人力資源部門經理把我叫進她的辦公室，然後給我一份文件讓我簽字，上面寫着（還有其他內容）我和男朋友的關係是“自願的”。

One reason I chose this internship in the first place is because my boyfriend, who graduated last year, works here now, and we thought it would be great to spend the summer at the same firm, although we are in different departments. But why is the fact that we're a couple any of the company's business? Having to sign this agreement (which my boyfriend also signed) seems kind of intrusive, doesn't it? What do you think?

我選擇這份實習工作的首要原因就是因爲，我男朋友（去年畢業）現在正在這裏工作。我們認爲，兩個人能在同一家公司過這個夏天簡直太棒了，雖然我們在不同的部門。但我們是情侶關係關公司什麼事？籤這樣的協議讓我感覺受到了干擾。您怎麼看？

-- Wondering on Wall Street

——華爾街的疑惑者

Dear Wondering: I'm a little surprised that the HR person didn't explain this to you, but what the company is doing is trying to prevent a potential sexual harassment lawsuit. The document you signed -- sometimes called a "cupid contract" or a "love agreement" -- probably spells out the firm's policy on sexual harassment, including to whom you can turn for help if your romance goes sour and your boyfriend starts, for instance, stalking you at work or threatening to get you fired. (I know, that probably strikes you as wildly unlikely, but it's been known to happen.)

親愛的疑惑者：人力資源部竟然沒有向你解釋這件事，這令我有點意外，不過公司的做法是在避免可能發生的性騷擾訴訟。你所簽署的文件有時候被稱作“丘比特協議”或“愛情協議”，其中肯定清楚說明了公司有關性騷擾的政策，包括當你們的戀愛關係出現問題，或者比如你男朋友開始在工作中騷擾你或威脅讓你被炒魷魚時，你可以向誰求助。（我知道你肯定認爲這樣的事情是不可能發生的，但現實中的確發生過此類事件。）

Asking you to confirm in writing that the relationship is voluntary gives the company a defense later on if you try to sue on the grounds that you were coerced or intimidated into accepting your boyfriend's amorous advances. "But a 'cupid contract' is partly for your own protection as well," notes Merry Campbell, co-chair of the employment law practice at Shulman, Rogers, Gandal, Pordy & Ecker in Washington, D.C. "The agreement should indicate to you that, if the romance ends badly, it won't affect your position at work, and you have the right to bring any repercussions -- for example, retaliation on your boyfriend's part -- to management's attention."

公司要求你書面確認你與男朋友的關係純屬自願，這樣一來，如果日後你試圖以自己受到脅迫或恫嚇才接受男朋友的求愛爲理由提出訴訟，公司可以有辯護的證據。不過，瑪麗•坎貝爾認爲：“‘丘比特協議’很大程度上也是對你自身的保護。這份協議應該向你說明，如果戀愛關係出現糟糕的結局，並不會影響你在工作中的位置，你有權讓管理層注意到關係結束所帶來的任何影響——比如男朋友的報復等。”坎貝爾是華盛頓特區Shulman, Rogers, Gandal, Pordy & Ecker律師事務所的聯席主席，該律所主要辦理僱傭法案件。

All this talk of contracts and lawsuits might come as a shock to anyone too young to remember a rash of high-profile sexual harassment suits in the '90s -- not to mention a few more recent ones, like the 2011 case where a jury awarded $10.6 million to a Kansas City employee of UBS Financial Services whose supervisor had harassed her.

對於像你這樣的年輕人來說，關於合同和訴訟的話題可能會讓你們感到震驚，因爲你們或許不記得上世紀90年代一大批備受關注的性騷擾案——更不用說最近的一些案件，比如2011年，陪審團判定，瑞銀金融服務公司（UBS Financial Services）需向一名受到上司性騷擾的堪薩斯城員工賠償1,060萬美元。

In fact, a new poll by work-life and benefits consultants Workplace Options suggests the millennial generation is blissfully unaware of how messy, and how nasty, sex in the office can get. Consider: 84% of 18-to-29-year-olds say they'd date a coworker, versus 36% of Gen Xers (ages 30 to 45) and only 29% of Boomers (45-65). Almost three-quarters of millennials (71%) "see a workplace romance as having positive effects such as improved performance and morale," the report adds.

事實上，工作生活與福利諮詢公司Workplace Options最新進行的調查顯示，天真的千禧一代全然不知辦公室裏的兩性關係會變得多麼污穢和骯髒。18至29歲的年輕人中，有84%表示他們會與同事約會，而30至45歲的X一代爲36%，嬰兒潮一代（45至65歲）則僅有29%。報告還顯示，約有四分之三（71%）的千禧一代認爲“辦公室戀情會產生積極的影響，比如提升工作表現，鼓舞士氣等。”

In some corporate cultures, that may be true. "It really varies a lot from one company to another," Campbell observes. "In some cultures, half the employees are dating, or married to, the other half and it's not a problem -- at least not yet." In many other companies, though, office romances are strongly discouraged, or even prohibited.

在有些企業文化中，辦公室戀情或許能有積極的影響。但坎貝爾認爲：“公司與公司之間差別很大。在有些公司文化中，有一半員工正在與另外一半員工約會，或已經結成夫妻，所以辦公室戀情不是問題——至少現在還不是問題。”但在其他許多公司當中，辦公室戀情遭到強烈反對，甚至被嚴令禁止。

Especially ominous for employers (and their lawyers) is that, as a group, the millennial generation is more than three times more likely to see no problem with dating their supervisors than all other age groups combined, the Workplace Options study notes: 40% of millennials would get involved with a boss, versus just 12% of older employees.

整個千禧一代中，認爲與上司約會不是什麼問題的人所佔的比例是其他所有年齡段的三倍以上，而且Workplace Options的研究發現：40%的千禧一代願意與老闆發生關係，而更年長的員工中，這一比例僅有12%。這對於僱主（和他們的律師）來說可絕對不是好兆頭。

"There is a lot of potential liability if one party in a relationship reports to the other," Campbell says. "One concern is, what about the people who are not in the relationship? Employers are responsible for making sure there is no perceived, or actual, favoritism" -- where, for example, the boss' sweetie gets better assignments than everybody else.

坎貝爾說：“如果關係中的一方與另一方是上下級，它會產生許多潛在的責任。其中的一個擔憂是，兩人關係之外的其他人該怎麼辦？僱主必須確保，不會出現任何被感知的或實際發生的偏袒，”比如老闆的情人能得到比其他人更好的差事。

It's a big reason why some companies have a policy of separating the lovebirds, either by moving one of them to a different part of the firm or, if that's not possible, asking one or the other to resign. "That's a best practice, not a legal requirement," Campbell notes. "But it does minimize the company's legal liability."

這也是許多公司不得不棒打鴛鴦散的主要原因。許多公司會將其中一人調往不同的部門，如果這種辦法行不通，則會要求其中一人辭職。坎貝爾稱：“這是最好的做法，雖然不是法律規定。這樣確實能夠將公司的法律責任降到最低。”

When a supervisor and a subordinate are involved with each other, she adds, the part of the cupid contract that says the romance is voluntary is especially important, from a legal point of view: "It establishes from the outset that there is no quid pro quo sexual harassment taking place." That's the kind where a boss tells an underling, for example, "You can have a raise if you sleep with me."

她補充道，如果是上司和下屬發生關係，丘比特協議中聲明這種關係是自願的條款就變得尤爲重要，因爲從法律角度：“這個條款從一開始就明確了沒有發生存在補償條件的性騷擾。”所謂的補償條件，比如有上司對下屬說：“跟我上牀，我就給你漲工資。”

Of course, that doesn't apply to you and your boyfriend -- but I bet this whole subject is a bigger can of worms than you suspected. Considering all the various ways that office romances can turn ugly and litigious, having to sign a cupid contract might not seem so strange.

當然，這並不適合你和你男朋友——但我敢打賭，這個話題比你想象的更加複雜。考慮到美好的辦公室戀情最後可能變得異常醜陋，昔日戀人甚至可能對簿公堂，簽署一份丘比特協議也就沒什麼大驚小怪的了。

Talkback: Have you ever been involved with a coworker, or a boss? If so, what effect (if any) did it have on your job, or your career? Leave a comment below.

反饋：你是否曾與同事或上司發生過關係？如果有，這種關係對你的工作或職業造成了什麼影響（如果有影響的話）？歡迎評論。