怎樣和你不喜歡的人一起工作?

Sometimes in your career, you will come across having to work with people you don't like. So, how do you work with them? Admittedly, it is a huge challenge for many people,but it is a fact of working life. No matter how much we do not like it, the interactions are crucial to get work done.

在你的職業生涯中，有時你不得不與你不喜歡的人一起共事。那麼，你該如何同他們一起工作呢？誠然，對於許多人來說，這是一個巨大的挑戰，但這就是工作中的現實。無論你多麼討厭它，但其中的交互作用對完成工作都是至關重要的。

Many newbies and veteransalike are caught asking this question day-in and day-out at work – how do I work with people I don't like? Should I force myself to do it? Pretend I like them? Do I really leave my values at home when I go to work?

在職場中，許多新人和老人都會日復一日地陷入問這個問題的怪圈而不可自拔——如何與我不喜歡的人共事？是否應該強迫自己與之共事呢？是否要假裝我喜歡他們？在工作中我是否真的要捨棄自己的價值觀呢？

The answer is – no, you do not have to. Of course the remedy may not be easy. It will entail you having to step out of your ego for a while to see what is truly happening and to give you clarity of the situation. That stepping out of your own ego is the toughest to do. But it is a worthwhile step. When you are able to do it, it feels like a huge stone is lifted off your to work with people you don't like? Try these 3 steps individually or in combination.

答案是——不，你不需要那麼做。當然，解決辦法不那麼簡單。你必須暫時放下自尊，看看到底發生了什麼，以便讓自己認清形勢。放下自尊是一件最艱難的事情，但同時也是值得嘗試的一個舉措。當你能夠放下自尊，你會覺得心裏像是搬走一塊巨石。如何與你不喜歡的人共事呢？將以下三種方法分別嘗試一下或組合在一起試試吧。

Engage

吸引注意

To engage in this case means to communicate with them. Step out of your own ego to get yourself to sincerely talk to them. You may be pleasantly surprised that the other person wants to talk engage also means not to hold any grudges against the other person. Face the issue with the other party and discuss whatever challenges you may have candidly. Say what you mean politely. You can be stern but do not be rude. The important thing about how to work with people you don't like is to be sincere about it.

吸引注意在這種情況下意味着與他們交流。你要放下自尊，真誠地與他們交談。很可能你會喜悅地發現別人也想與你聊天。吸引注意同時還意味着你不能抱有怨恨他人的想法。與對方一起直面這個問題，坦率地討論你可能懷有的質疑，婉轉地說出你想表達的意思。你可以嚴肅，但絕不可以粗魯。與不喜歡的人共事，重要的一點是態度要真誠。

When you are sincere,you are seeking a win-win situation. Think about this, when you engage this person,being sincere is also a transfer of feelings, which means you want the other person to know that you genuinely want tosettle any animosity you have with each other. It helps you in the long run too.

當你的態度真誠時，你是在尋求一種雙贏的局面。想想看，當你吸引了這個人的注意時，真誠也會讓你的態度感染對方。它意味着你想讓對方知道你真的想消除你們之間存在的任何敵意。這個方法從長遠來看也是有利於你的。

Enlighten

瞭解彼此

Have you ever tried to enlighten them about yourself? Have you ever tried to enlighten yourself about them? Perhaps one reason you do not like them is that you do not understand them. And because of it, whatever they do doesn't seem right. Then all the negativity feeds on each other and the animosity grows.

你是否曾嘗試過讓他們瞭解你呢？你是否曾嘗試讓自己去了解他們？也許你不喜歡他們的一個原因是你不瞭解他們。正因如此，他們的所作所爲在你看起來纔不恰當。然後所有這些消極性會侵蝕彼此，讓敵意滋長。

Seek to allow them to get to know you information about you may enlighten them about you. It gives them insight into who you are, why you do those things and the way you do them. When people understand you more, there is a better chance they will begin to like you. Of course, there is no guarantee it will work. At the very least there is a chance.

想方設法讓他們瞭解你這個人。關於你的信息可能會令他們熟悉你。那會讓他們深入瞭解你這個人，你爲什麼會做那事以及你的做事方法。當人們更多地瞭解你時，他們才很有可能開始喜歡你。當然，不能保證這一定能奏效。但至少這是一次機會。

Get to know them on a more personal level ghten yourself about them. What makes them tick, what you do disturbs them or even irritates them? Perhaps with this piece of information you may start to know how to work with people you don't like.

你也要從私人的角度更多地瞭解他們。你要弄明白他們工作的動力是什麼，你做什麼事會妨礙到他們或甚至使他們發怒。也許從這些信息中你可以開始學會如何與你不喜歡的人共事。

Entertain

取悅他人

To do this, first you must be able to have a sense of humor. Sure, to have a sense of humor around someone you don't like is tough. But the tougher thing is that you should have a sense of humor when the situation becomes tense and when you feel animosity. Cracking a joke and looking at the lighter side of things can break a smile on the face of people you don't like.

要做到這點，首先你一定要擁有幽默感。當然，對着一個你不喜歡的人產生幽默感挺不容易的。而更加困難的是，當形勢變得緊張並且你感受到敵意時，你更應具備幽默感。講講笑話，多考慮事情較好的那面，能讓你不喜歡的人面露微笑。

When you do that you can be someone fun to work with. Perhaps you never think of it, but you are someone who is tough to work with. Have you ever considered you are part of the problem?

如果你能做到以上那些，你就能成爲一個有趣的共事者。或許你從未想過，你可能是個很難共事的人。你是否考慮過你也是問題的一部分呢？

Ask yourself, are you fun to work with? Do you complain and gossip a lot? Perhaps you are too dogmatic with certain things. You could entertain the person with an afterwork drink. Or invite the person out for lunch. Sometimes it takes more than one session for the person to open up. At the very least, they do feel your sincerity. In a less formal situation people can open up and speak more frankly.

問問自己，你是個有趣的共事者嗎？你經常抱怨或議論是非嗎？也許你對某些問題過於固執己見。你可以招待那個人下班後喝一杯。或者邀請那個人一起吃頓午飯。有時候需要不止一次地嘗試，對方纔會敞開心扉。但至少他們能感受到你的真誠。在不那麼正式的場合，人們往往更容易敞開心扉，開誠佈公地交流。

Assuming the above is difficult to do, try to entertain yourself by the tough questions and resistance coming from the person. In work situations, you know the people whom you don't like is likely to raise toughquestions in order to make them difficult for you. It can be very satisfying when you are able to answer them. Dogged determination can wear even the most difficult person down.

假設以上方法太困難了，那麼就儘可能地從來自這個人的棘手問題和阻撓中獲得愉悅吧。在職場中，你知道你不喜的人很可能提出棘手的問題，用以給你造成困難。當你能夠解決它們時，你會非常滿足。堅定的決心能使最難相處的人折服。