简单的英语笑话短文
冷笑话的主要应用群体是熟悉网络的平民、青年、学生、白领等,他们具备熟练的网络技能、很强的接受新事物的能力以及开拓创新的精神。小编精心收集了简单的英语笑话短文，供大家欣赏学习!
Could You Hurry It up a little?
你能不能快一点?
A man and his wife were cleaning out the attic when the husband found an ancient receipt.
一对夫妇正在清理阁楼，这时先生发现一张过期很久的旧收据。
"Hey, Nancy, look at this.
“嘿，南茜，你过来看看这个。
It's a receipt for a pair of shoes I left to be repaired and never picked up.
这张是以前皮鞋送修的收据，我忘了去拿回来。
It's eleven years old."
足足有十一年之久了!”
"You know, that shoe repair shop is still there," replied the wife.
“那间鞋店不是还在那里吗?”妻子回答。
"Why don't you just drop in there and hand him the receipt as if it were nothing unusual."
“为什么不跑一趟，把收据交给他，就当作没事发生一样?"
And that is what the husband did.
先生去了那家鞋店。
Quietly the cobbler went to the back of his shop and poked around a bit,came back to thecounter and said "They'll be ready next Tuesday. "
鞋匠静静地走到后头，东翻西翻了一会儿之后，回到柜台说道：“下星期二才能修好!”
简单的英语笑话短文篇2All's Well That Ends Well
结局好的就是好
Three rather deaf friends met on a street corner.
三个重听很严重的朋友在街角碰面。
"Windy today, isn't it?" said the first.
“今天风好大，不是吗?’第一个说。
"No, it's Thursday, " said the second.
“不，今天是礼拜四，”第二个说。
"Me too; let's go get a drink, " said the third.
“我也很渴，走，我们去喝杯饮料，”第三个说道。
简单的英语笑话短文篇3Thanks a Lot Sarge
多谢了，班长
The sergeant had just completed the morning inspection of the troops.
一位班长刚完成部队晨间检查。
"Before I dismiss you, there's just one announcement. Private Kowalski, your mother is issed."
“解散之前，有件事要宣布一下，二等兵卡瓦斯基，你母亲已经过世了。解散!”
The soldier was devastated, of course, and the lieutenant was appalled at the sergeant'sheartlessness.
当然，那位士兵遭受很大的打击，而排长也讶异于班长的冷酷无情。
"For Heaven' s sake, sergeant, next time you have to inform a trooper of a loved one' sdemise,please be a little more subtle," he said.
“看在老天的份分上，班长，下次你要告诉弟兄们有亲人死亡时，请多用点技巧，委婉一些，”排长说道。
A few weeks later, sorry to say, the sergeant had another opportunity.
几个礼拜之后，很不幸那位班长又有一次机会。
Lining up his troops, he ordered, "All of you whose mother is still alive, step forward. Not you,Johnson."
集合了部队，他下口令道：“所有妈妈尚健在的，前进一步。你，约翰逊，除外。”
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