家庭軟暴力 Soft Family Violence

With the development of city civilization,family violence seems already went out of our sight. While we are celebratingthat kids are not getting hurt in family violence, there is damage way kind of way will not hurt child physically, but spiritual. We call thatsoft violence, which means hurting people with words.

隨着城市文明的發展，我們似乎已經看不到家庭暴力的跡象了。然而就在我們慶祝孩子不會被家庭暴力傷害的時候，另一種傷害方式出現了。這種方式不會給孩子造成身體上的傷害，而是心靈上的。我們叫這種作軟暴力，就是用語言傷害人們。

Ican see that most parents still not understand what does soft violence means,they usually think that beating kids is violence, but soft violence, they haveno idea. For instance, most parents would say the word to kids like “You haveto study hard, or you will not find a good job. And if you don’t have a goodjob, how could you suppose to wait on and support us when we are getting old?”does it sound familiar to you? The words like thatwill cause serious psychological burden to young little kids, and they wouldstudy every hard and ignore their health, while they are in the high stress toworry about they will not find a good job, and have no ability to support theirold parents, that would become a black sheep.

我能看到大部分父母都不知道軟暴力是什麼意思，他們通常認爲打孩子纔是暴利，但是軟暴力，還真不知道是什麼。例如，許多父母會對孩子說這樣的話“你要努力學習，不然你就會找不到好工作。如果你找不到好工作，那在我們老的時候就養不了我們了。”這對你來說耳熟麼？這種話會對小孩子造成嚴重的心理負擔，他們會無視健康而搏命學習，同時還要處在擔憂以後找不到好工作，沒辦法贍養父母的高壓下，這會讓他們變成不孝子女。

Inaddition, “you classmate is better than you in math or English, why would youdo an excellent job just like them?” this kind of word will hurt kid’s esteemdeeply. They might think that they are never good enough for their parents, andit will probably lead to depressive disorder.

還有，“你的同學在數學和英語都好過你，你怎麼就不能像他們那樣出色呢？”這種話會深深地傷害孩子的自尊。他們會認爲他們對父母來說永遠都不夠好，這很可能會引發抑鬱症。

Therefore, when parents teach children, they should not only usephysical violence but also not soft violence, because the damage of both violenceis equal.

 因此，當父母在教育孩子的時候，他們不僅不能用物理暴力，也不能用軟暴力，因爲這兩種方式造成的傷害是相等的。