最搞笑的英文小笑話欣賞
笑話使人們在刻板的生活中感到一絲快意和放鬆。在交際場合,能恰到好處地講個笑話或自創一個幽默,不僅可以體現自己的語言水平,還可以提升個人魅力。本站小編分享最搞笑的英文小笑話，希望可以幫助大家!
Matt and his wife lived in the country. Matt was very stingy and hated spending money. One day a fair came to the nearby town.
"Let's go to the fair, Matt," his wife said. "We haven't been anywhere for a long time."
Matt thought about this for a while. He knew he would have to spend money at the fair. At last he said, "All right, but I'm not going to spend much money. We'll look at things, but we won't buy anything. "
They went to the fair and looked at all the things to buy. There were many things Matt's wife wanted to buy, but he would not let her spend any money.
Then, in a nearby field, they saw a small airplane.
"Fun flights!" the notice said, " $ 10 for 10 minutes.
Matt had never been in an airplane and he wanted to go on a fun flight. However, he didn't want to have to pay for his wife, as well.
"I've only got $ 10, " he told the pilot. "Can my wife come with me for free?" The pilot wasn't selling many tickets, so he said, "I'll make a bargain with you. If your wife doesn't scream or shout, she can have a free flight."
Matt agreed, and got into the small airplane with his wife.
The pilot took off and made his airplane do all kinds of things. At one moment it was flying upside down.
When the plane landed, the pilot said, "0. K. your wife didn't make a sound. She can have her ride free."
"Thank you," Matt said. "It wasn't easy for her, you know, especially when she fell out."
麥特和妻子住在鄉下。麥特很吝嗇，討厭花錢。一天附近的鎮子逢集。
“我們去趕集，麥特，”妻子說。“我們很久沒出去了。”
麥特想了一會兒。他知道在集市上一定得花錢。最後他說：“好吧，但我不打算花太多錢。我們只看不買。”
他們去集市，看看所有可買的東西。有很多東西麥特的妻子想買，但麥特不讓她買。
然後在附近的露天場地，他們看到一架小飛機。
“有趣的飛行。”海報上寫着，“10分鐘10美元。”
麥特從來沒有乘過飛機，所以他想乘一次小飛機。然而他不想付他妻子的票錢。
“我只帶了10美元，”他對飛機駕駛員說，“我妻子能免費和我一起乘飛機嗎?”駕駛員沒賣出多少票，所以他說：“我和你做個交易。如果你妻子不尖叫，也不叫出聲來，她就能免費飛行。”
麥特同意了，他和妻子一起登上了飛機。
飛機起飛了，駕駛員讓飛機做出各種各樣的動作。有一會兒飛機倒着飛行。
飛機着陸時，駕駛員說，“好吧，你妻子沒發出任何聲響。她就不用買飛機票了。”
“謝謝，”麥特說，“你知道，這對她不容易，特別當她剛纔掉下去的時候。”
最搞笑的英文小笑話：一廂情願的誤會At the supermarket I noticed an elderly man who seemed to be following me wherever I went. As I moved to each aisle, there he was, smiling at me. Now I was wondering if he was interested in me. At the dairy counter I was checking out the eggs when I felt a tap on my shoulder. Turning around, I saw that it was the same man. "Lady," he finally said, "you have my shopping cart."
在超市我注意到一位上了年紀的男子好像總在跟着我。我每到一個售貨通道，他就跟我到一個售貨通道，微笑地看着我。我開始想他是不是喜歡上我了。在乳品櫃，我正給雞蛋包裝結賬時，有人在我肩上輕拍了一下。我轉過身發現還是那個男子。“女士，”他終於開口說話了，“你用着我的購物車呢。”
最搞笑的英文小笑話：Losing One PoundI complimented one of my co-workers on having lost ten pounds. However, I couldn't resistbragging that when I was 17, 1 weighed 225 pounds and today I tip the scales at 224. 1 added, "That's not bad for a man of my age."
Overhearing this, a woman remarked, "You mean to say it took you all this time to lose onepound?"
我稱讚我的一個同事減肥10磅。可是，我禁不住誇耀說我17歲時，體重225磅，而目前體重是224磅。我還說：“這對我這樣年齡的男子來說，是不錯的。”
一個女子聽到了這些話，她說道：“你是說你花了這麼長時間才減了1磅?”
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