《美食祈禱和戀愛》Chapter 21 (41):如何定義快樂大綱

For me, though, a major obstacle in my pursuit of pleasure was my ingrained sense of Puritan guilt. Do I really deserve this pleasure? This is very American, too—the insecurity about whether we have earned our happiness. Planet Advertising in America orbits completely around the need to convince the uncertain consumer that yes, you have actually warranted a special treat. This Bud's for You! You Deserve a Break Today! Because You're Worth It! You've Come a Long Way, Baby! And the insecure consumer thinks, Yeah! Thanks! I am gonna go buy a six-pack, damn it! Maybe even two six-packs! And then comes the reactionary binge. Followed by the remorse. Such advertising campaigns would probably not be as effective in the Italian culture, where people already know that they are entitled to enjoyment in this life. The reply in Italy to "You Deserve a Break Today" would probably be, Yeah, no duh. That's why I'm planning on taking a break at noon, to go over to your house and sleep with your wife.

然而對我來說，追求快樂的主要障礙是我根深蒂固的清教徒罪惡感。我是否該擁有這種快樂？這也是很典型的美國態度——對於自己是否值得快樂，感到惶惑不安。美國的廣告系統完全環繞在說服拿不定主意的消費者：是的，你確實有權享受特殊待遇。這啤酒是給你的！你今天應該休息一下！因爲你值得！苦盡甘來了，寶貝！缺乏安全感的消費者心想，是啊！謝啦！我就去買個該死的半打吧！乾脆一打算了！而後開始反動式地狂飲。接着才懊悔不已。這類廣告戰在意大利文化中很可能起不了效用，因爲人們早已知道他們有權享受人生。在意大利，面對 “你今天應該休息一下”的回答可能是：“對啊，不，廢話。所以我打算中午休息一下，去你家和你老婆睡覺。”

Which is probably why, when I told my Italian friends that I'd come to their country in order to experience four months of pure pleasure, they didn't have any hang-ups about it. Complimenti! Vai avanti! Congratulations, they would say. Go ahead. Knock yourself out. Be our guest. Nobody once said, "How completely irresponsible of you," or "What a self-indulgent luxury." But while the Italians have given me full permission to enjoy myself, I still can't quite let go. During my first few weeks in Italy, all my Protestant synapses were zinging in distress, looking for a task. I wanted to take on pleasure like a homework assignment, or a giant science fair project. I pondered such questions as, "How is pleasure most efficiently maximized?" I wondered if maybe I should spend all my time in Italy in the library, doing research on the history of pleasure. Or maybe I should interview Italians who've experienced a lot of pleasure in their lives, asking them what their pleasures feel like, and then writing a report on this topic. (Double-spaced and with one-inch margins, perhaps? To be turned in first thing Monday morning?)

或許因爲如此，當我告訴意大利朋友們，我到他們的國家來體驗四個月純粹的快樂，他們對此並無任何心理障礙。“Complimenti!Vai avanti!”（恭喜），他們會這麼說。就這麼辦吧。盡情玩吧。來我們家做客吧。從來沒有人說：“你完全缺乏責任感”或者“多麼自我耽溺的享受”。然而儘管意大利人完全允許我好好享受，我卻仍無法完全放鬆。在意大利的頭幾個禮拜，我的每根清教徒神經都在蠢動，到處找尋任務。我想把快樂當做家庭作業或龐大的科學研究來處理。我思索這類問題：“如何以最有效的方式強化快樂？”我心想，或許我在意大利的全部時間應當待在圖書館研究快樂的歷史。或者應當去採訪在生活中體驗許多快樂的意大利人，問他們快樂是什麼感覺，然後以此爲題寫篇報告。（或許雙倍行距、留一吋邊？週一一大早就把稿子交出去？）

When I realized that the only question at hand was, "How do I define pleasure?" and that I was truly in a country where people would permit me to explore that question freely, everything changed. Everything became . . . delicious. All I had to do was ask myself every day, for the first time in my life, "What would you enjoy doing today, Liz? What would bring you pleasure right now?" With nobody else's agenda to consider and no other obligations to worry about, this question finally became distilled and absolutely self-specific.

當我明白手邊的唯一問題是“如何定義快樂”，而當我真正待在這個人們准許我放手探索這個問題的國家時，一切都改觀了。一切都開始變得……美味。有生以來第一次，我每天只需要問自己：“你今天樂於做什麼事，小莉？現在什麼東西能帶給你快樂？”無須考慮任何人的議程，也無須憂心任何責任，這個問題終於變得純粹而確定。

It was interesting for me to discover what I did not want to do in Italy, once I'd given myself executive authorization to enjoy my experience there. There are so many manifestations of pleasure in Italy, and I didn't have time to sample them all. You have to kind of declare a pleasure major here, or you'll get overwhelmed. That being the case, I didn't get into fashion, or opera, or cinema, or fancy automobiles, or skiing in the Alps. I didn't even want to look at that much art. I am a bit ashamed to admit this, but I did not visit a single museum during my entire four months in Italy. (Oh, man—it's even worse than that. I have to confess that I did go to one museum: the National Museum of Pasta, in Rome.) I found that all I really wanted was to eat beautiful food and to speak as much beautiful Italian as possible. That was it. So I declared a double major, really—in speaking and in eating (with a concentration on gelato).

一旦准許自己在這兒享受經驗，而且瞭解自己在意大利什麼事也不想做 ，對我而言是有趣的事。意大利有多種快樂的表現形式，而我沒有時間全部嘗試。你得在這兒宣告你的主修，否則會應接不暇。既然如此，我感興趣的並非時尚、歌劇、電影、高級車，或去阿爾卑斯山滑雪。我甚至不那麼想觀看藝術。在意大利的整整四個月當中，我沒去過任何博物館，我承認這一點讓我有些羞愧。（天啊——更糟糕的是，我得承認我的確去過一家博物館：位於羅馬的國立面 食博物館［National Museum of Pasta］。）我發現我真正想做的是吃美好的食物，儘可能多說美好的意大利語。就這樣。因此事實上，我宣告了雙主修——說話與飲食（專修冰品 ）。