《美食祈禱和戀愛》Chapter 62 (138):把握偉大的心靈時光
On my ride back to the Ashram, after seeing Richard off at the airport, I decide that I've been talking too much. To be honest, I've been talking too much my whole life, but I've really been talking too much during my stay at the Ashram. I have another two months here, and I don't want to waste the greatest spiritual opportunity of my life by being all social and chatty the whole time. It's been amazing for me to discover that even here, even in a sacred environment of spiritual retreat on the other side of the world, I have managed to create a cocktail-party-like vibe around me. It's not just Richard I've been talking to constantly—though we did do the most gabbing—I'm always yakking with somebody. I've even found myself—in an Ashram, mind you!—creating appointments to see acquaintances, having to say to somebody, "I'm sorry, I can't hang out with you at lunch today because I promised Sakshi I would eat with her . . . maybe we could make a date for next Tuesday."
去機場爲理查送行後，我在回道場途中，斷定自己的話一直太多。老實說，我這一生已經講了太多的話，但我待在道場這段期間的確也講太多話了。我在這裏還有兩個月的時間，我不想把一生最偉大的心靈時光，全浪費在整天搞社交、喋喋不休之上。我訝異地發現，即使在這世界彼端的神聖靜修環境下，我竟也能在周遭製造出雞尾酒會似的氣氛。我不僅一天到晚跟理查說話——雖然我們最常聊天打屁——也經常和他人饒舌。我甚至發現自己——在一所“道場”，請注意！——跟朋友約時間見面，也必須先對某某人說：“很抱歉，今天中午沒辦法跟你吃飯，因爲我答應莎克希要跟她吃飯……也許我們可以改約下禮拜二。”
This has been the story of my life. It's how I am. But I've been thinking lately that this is maybe a spiritual liability. Silence and solitude are universally recognized spiritual practices, and there are good reasons for this. Learning how to discipline your speech is a way of pre-venting your energies from spilling out of you through the rupture of your mouth, exhausting you and filling the world with words, words, words instead of serenity, peace and bliss. Swam-iji, my Guru's master, was a stickler about silence in the Ashram, heavily enforcing it as a de-votional practice. He called silence the only true religion. It's ridiculous how much I've been talking at this Ashram, the one place in the world where silence should—and can—reign.
這是我的生活方式。這就是我。不過近來我在想，這或許不利於心靈。沉默與孤寂是世人公認的心靈實踐。這有其理由。學習如何控制自己說話，避免讓能量通過嘴巴泄漏出來，筋疲力竭，讓世界充滿一大堆廢話，而非靜謐、和平與幸福。我導師的師父思瓦米吉相當堅持在道場保持靜默，十分強調靜默是一種信仰實踐。他把靜默稱作唯一真實的宗教。我在本該萬籟俱寂的道場如此聒噪，着實荒唐。
