單身的五種幸福
Learn to appreciate your single status. Here are five things that singles sometimes take for granted.
學會珍惜你的單身。以下5件事被認爲是單身漢纔有資格享受的幸福。
Step 1: Sleep
睡覺
Sleep is a beautiful thing. When you're single, no one's nagging at you to get up or counting the hours that you've spent in bed. You are left in peace with your box fan and body pillow. Sleep all day guilt-free!
睡覺是一件美妙的事情。當你單身時，沒有人會催促你起牀或責怪你在牀上睡了多長時間。你擁有的只是轉頁扇和靠枕。所以即使你呼呼大睡一天也毫無內疚感。
Step 2: Money
錢
When you're single, there's no joint account. You can do whatever you want with your money. There's none of that "what's yours is mine, what's mine is yours" foolishness. No household budget. Go ahead and buy that hideous, life-size statue of Wayne Newton. Put it in the middle of the living room. No one is the boss of you!
當你單身時，不存在共同賬戶。你可以買你想要的任何東西。像“你的就是我的，我的就是你的”之類的愚蠢的觀點完全不存在。你也不必擔心家庭收支。你想買那個真人大小的雷人韋恩牛頓雕像就去買吧。把它放在起居室的中間。沒人可以管你！
Step 3: Career
工作
Work all night, all weekend if you want to. Then socialize with the boss until 2:00AM or later. Your married co-workers can't compete. They've got "commitments". You win by default! And when that headhunter calls, there's no one holding you back. Pack up and move wherever the fattest paycheck is waiting.
只要你願意，你可以整夜整星期的工作。或者和老闆應酬到凌晨2點甚至更晚。你那些結婚的同事在這方面比不過你。因爲他們肩負着“承諾”。你因對方棄權而輕鬆獲勝。當有獵頭看中你時，也沒有人可以拖住你。整理行裝，去任何一個薪水更多的公司吧。
Step 4: Rejection
拒絕
When you're single, rejection is your friend. If you're on a bad date, make up some excuse and get the heck out of there. You don't have to ever see her again.
當你單身時，拒絕是你的朋友。如果你的約會很糟糕，那就編造一些理由閃人吧。你不必再和他（她）見面。
Step 5: Amuse Yourself
自娛自樂
Host a poker tournament complete with back up dancers. See how much laundry you can fit into the washer. Create a new dish out of the few things you have left in the cupboard and eat it in the middle of the night. Become a pro at belching the alphabet. The possibilities are endless.
舉辦一個錦標賽，並且有跳舞的拉拉隊。看看你有多少要洗的衣服。把碗裏吃剩的菜創新出一道新菜餚，順便在午夜時享用它。或者成爲一個打嗝高手。各種可能無極限。
