新郎的結婚明細 北京篇(圖)
Jiang Chen (not his real name), a 26-year-old public servant, got married on April 10. It took him two and half years to prepare. The couple and their parents spent a total of 1.2 million yuan on starting a new life together, including the wedding and honeymoon trip, and buying a home, furniture and a car.
The wedding dress was the first expense. The pragmatic bride-to-be initially planned to rent a gown. But when she cheerfully tried on the rented dress at home, her mother went to the kitchen without so much as a glance at the dress and refused to come back to see how it fit.
The bride-to-be spent a long time online that evening and found a nice, brand new wedding dress for a reasonable price - 1,000 yuan. She didn't tell her mother she bought it online and said it cost 5,000 yuan, which satisfied her mother.
Jiang's already-married friends gave him some tips, which helped the young couple save a good deal of money on wedding cars. Jiang hired a driver from Tianjin with a red Mercedes convertible. The car was decent enough and the price was cheaper than those of drivers from Beijing. The following motorcade needed to all be red Mazdas, since Jiang's parents-in-law gave the couple money to buy a Mazda as a gift. They found drivers with the right cars and free time on the wedding day through a Mazda club online and paid several hundred yuan to each driver for their services.
The wedding reception cost a fortune. They spent 150 yuan for each person and had about 80 guests. The total gift-money they received was less than 20,000 yuan, so not much of it was left after deducting the lunch expenses. The bride recorded everyone's contribution and told Jiang: "We need to give the money back when they have something to celebrate."
Here are Jiang's own words about how he got a home, car and diamond ring for his wife:
江城(化名)，一位26歲的公務員, 經過兩年半的準備，今年4月10號結婚了. 這對新婚夫婦和他們雙方的父母總共花了120,0000元開啓了他們兩人一起的新生活，包括婚禮，蜜月旅行，買房子，傢俱和車子.
結婚禮服是第一筆花銷。務實的小兩口原本打算是去租一套禮服的。但是當新娘在家愉快的展示自己租來的禮服時候，她的媽媽甚至連看都沒看一眼，就跑到廚房去了，不願告訴女兒衣服到底合不合適。
當天晚上他們花了很長時間，在網上找到一件漂亮的，新的禮服，價錢也很合適，只有1000元. 她沒有告訴媽媽這是從網上買來的，並說花了5000元買的, 這讓媽媽很高興。
江城已經結婚的朋友給他一些小建議，幫他節省了很多婚車的費用. 他從天津連人帶車租來一輛紅色敞篷大奔. 車子很體面並且價錢比北京要便宜不少. 江的岳父母家給了他們一輛紅色馬自達作爲女兒的嫁妝，所以其他婚車也都要是紅色的馬自達. 他們從網上的一個馬自達俱樂部，找到在婚禮當天有空的會員，付給每輛車幾百塊服務費.
婚禮宴會花了一大筆錢。每個人150元的接待標準，共80位賓客. 他們總共收到約20,000禮金, 所以基本是收支相抵了。新娘記下每個人的禮金數，並告訴江城: 當他們有什麼要慶祝的時候，我們需要如數送回去.
以下是江城自己記錄的，關於他們家買房，買車，爲老婆買鑽戒的事情:
Home
Buying and decorating a house has been the biggest task for me during the past two years. Many people said my father was silly to buy a house at that time.
"It is not the first time I have been silly. To marry a girl, to have a son, to help get a wife for the son - I have been silly for my whole life," said my father.
My father says I am totally dependent on him and my mother, which is true. I don't want to depend on them, but I cannot afford a house by myself. If I had not bought a house, I could not have gotten married. Many women have "owning a home" as their top requirement for prospective husbands.
You may have to live on the far outskirts of Beijing and you may have to struggle to pay the mortgage for a long time, but you must own a home.
I am lucky that my parents bought me a two-bedroom apartment in Daxing district. My father paid the full price and the property rights belong to me.
"Your apartment and your wedding have cost me all my savings. I am done buying things for you - do not come to me again for money," my father said. "If you cannot afford a kid, do not have one, keeping in mind that you will probably need to buy a house for your child when you are old."
I kept silent when my father told me this. What could I say? With a 3,450 yuan monthly salary, I cannot even afford a doghouse in Beijing.
I used to tell my parents I would just remain single so they wouldn't need to spend any money helping me, but my father said I was his only son and that he would do whatever he could for me.
"Your mother and I will be happy if you are settled," he said.
I had a little savings, just enough to decorate my apartment in a simple style. The furniture was from Ikea and my wife bought appliances online or at outdoor markets. But it is nice to have our own apartment and the price of my home has doubled in only two years.
房子
買房和裝修房子是我過去兩年最大的任務. 很多人說我爸在那個時候買房太傻了。但我爸說：這不是我頭一回犯傻了。和一個女孩結婚，生孩子，爲兒子找媳婦，我這一輩子都在犯傻.
我爸說我完全依賴他和我媽，沒錯，我也不想總依靠他們，但是我沒法靠我自己買房子。如果我不能買房子，就沒法結婚. 許多女孩對未來丈夫的第一要求就是要'有房'.
你可以住在北京的郊區，或許你要奮鬥好長時間還清貸款，但是你必須有房子。
我很幸運父母爲我在大興區買了一個兩居室. 他們付了全款，而房子的產權屬於我。
'你的房子和結婚大事已經花完我所有的積蓄，該爲你做的，我都做了, 別再來問我要錢了', 我爸這樣告訴我, '如果你沒能力撫養一個孩子，就暫時不要，並且你要記住，以後等你做了爸爸後，你或許也要給你的兒子買房子'
我爸說這些的時候，我沒有說話。我能說什麼呢? 一個月3450元的工資，在北京我可能連蝸居就買不到。
我以前曾經告訴我爸，我要一直單身，這樣他們就不用操心幫我了，但我爸說我是他唯一的兒子，他會傾其所有來幫我(完成結婚大事的).
他說：你成家了，你媽和我都會高興的。
我有一點積蓄，只夠幫我的房間簡單裝修一下。傢俱是從宜家買的，電器是老婆網購的或是在露天大市場買的. 但是現在有了自己的房子感覺很好，而且房價就在這兩年漲了一倍.
Car
These days if the groom's family contributes a house, the bride's family often contributes at least a car to the marriage. The affordable homes are usually far from the city center and it usually takes more than three hours to commute, often longer if there's a traffic jam, which there frequently is in Beijing.
I never expected a fancy car such as a BMW or a Volvo from my wife's family. If I had found a wife from a family able to buy such cars I wouldn't have needed to use my parents' money to buy a home. So I was somewhat surprised when my wife's family gave us money to buy a nice Mazda.
I feel I cannot demand too much from my wife or her family. She has had a stepfather since she was young. Her mother lost her job a long time ago and has always felt that she is indebted to her current husband. Fortunately the stepfather is a kind man.
But I cannot ask for more. I've already got their daughter as my wife. Her mother doesn't earn much and, by tradition, her stepfather shouldn't have felt any obligation to help us financially when we got married.
I told my wife not to ask for anything from her family for our marriage. She agreed and asked me to do the same with my family. A car is only a means of transportation and doesn't need to be expensive, I told her.
But my wife's mother gave us 200,000 yuan to buy a car. I felt quite touched when I learned her stepfather contributed to the amount. My mother-in-law talked to him about this "big thing of marriage", saying things aren't falling into place financially. The stepfather was a bit upset when he heard my mother-in-law's plan to use her own savings, so in the end the 200,000 yuan came from my mother-in-law's own savings and my mother-in-law and stepfather-in-law's joint savings.
So we had a car for our marriage, although my mother-in-law said she wouldn't pay for any other extra expenses that come with the car.
車子
如今如果新郎家出錢買的房子，那新娘家通常都會出錢買車子. 房子的位置通常都離市中心很遠，上下班花3個多小時是很平常的，如果遇到堵車，還會更長時間。在北京堵車太平常了。
我從沒想過她家會送一輛多好的車，比如寶馬或是沃爾沃什麼的. 如果我老婆家能買這樣的車子，大概我也不需要花我父母的錢買房子了. 所以當她家送了馬自達的時候，我的確有些吃驚。
我知道我不能再要求她或者她傢什麼了. 她小的時候，她媽給她找了繼父. 她媽媽很久以前就失業了，總覺得虧欠現在的丈夫. 還好她的繼父是個很好的人.
我不能再要什麼了, 已經把他們的女兒娶來作爲我妻. 她媽掙錢很少，按道理她的繼父也沒有義務出錢幫我們結婚。
我告訴老婆不要向她家要什麼，她答應了並且要我也不要向家裏要什麼。車就是個代步工具，沒必要多貴的.
但岳母還是給了我們200,000元買車. 當我知道有一部分錢是她繼父拿出來的時候，我相當感動。岳母和她繼父說到我們的'結婚大事'，提到(買車的)錢還沒有全部到位. 她繼父聽說她媽打算全部用自己的積蓄的時候，有點兒不高興，最後這20萬出自岳母，以及岳母和她繼父的共同存款.
所以我們結婚後就有了車，儘管岳母不會付以後關於車子上花銷的任何其他費用.
Diamond ring
My fiance once asked me to watch the movie Lust, Caution, but going to the cinema costs at least 300 yuan, so I convinced her that we should just stay home and watch the DVD. She rewound and rewatched the part where the hero purchases a big diamond ring for the heroine.
I promised her I would buy one for her. I said I couldn't afford a ring like the one in the movie since I'm only at the lower end of the working class.
But eventually I went shopping with her for a diamond ring. We spent 6,000 yuan on a discounted white gold ring decorated with little diamonds. She was satisfied, almost too easily. So I felt a little guilty and told her to ask her mother whether the ring was suitable.
Her mother's advice was sincere, but bad for me. She suggested replacing the small diamonds with a big one-carat one, something more valuable for investment. My wife was going to spend 40,000 yuan of her savings on it. But I would have been ashamed to let my wife buy her own diamond ring.
So we chose a cheaper type of diamond with the simplest design and I borrowed 50,000 yuan from my parent to pay for it. My wife is a really good woman. After I bought her the ring, she insisted she would pay to decorate our house. I initially didn't want to let her, but I spent a little of her money in the end. I cannot ask for more from my parents, her family or from her.
鑽戒
結婚前，她曾經要求一起去看色戒，但是去電影院至少要花300元，於是我說服她我們就呆在家看DVD. 她反覆看了梁朝偉給湯唯買大鑽戒的那部分.
我答應她我會給她也買一個的。但是我說可能買不了像電影中那麼大隻的，我在單位還只是小羅羅(收入不高).
但是最終我還是買給她一個鑽戒. 我們花了6000元買了一個打折的白金戒指，鑲有小寶石的那種. (沒想到)這麼容易就讓她很滿意. 內疚的我讓她回去問她媽媽這個戒指是否合適.
她媽媽的建議很中肯，但於我確是壞消息... 她建議把上面的小寶石換成1克拉一個的那種, 更有投資價值. 於是她打算花40,000元自己的積蓄去換，但那樣我會感到羞愧的，怎能讓我的妻子花自己的錢買鑽戒.
我們選了一款便宜的，設計簡單的寶石，我從家裏又借了50,000元. 我的老婆真是太好了，我給他買了這個戒指後，她堅持她要付錢負責裝修. 原來我是不讓她花錢的，但是最後還是花了她一些錢. 我再不能向我的家人，她的家人和她，開口要什麼了.
