紳士養成計劃 記得給女士開車門麼
Should we say goodbye to chivalry in the age of gender equality?
在性別平等的時代，我們是不是要和 “騎士精神”說再見？Chivalry arose as a response to the violence of the Middle Ages, explains an Atlantic article. Pier Massimo Forni, a professor of Italian literature and the founder of the Civility Institute at Johns Hopkins in Baltimore, US, says that chivalry “was a form of preferential treatment that men once accorded to women generations ago, inspired by the sense that there was something special about women, that they deserve added respect, and that not doing so was uncouth, cowardly and essentially despicable.”
對此，《大西洋月刊》在一篇文章中寫到，騎士精神因爲中世紀的暴力而興起。皮耶爾•馬西莫•弗尼是美國巴爾的摩市約翰•霍普金斯大學的一名意大利文學教授，也是該校文明研究所的創始人。他認爲騎士精神“是沿襲幾代人的一種男性爲女性提供的優待。因爲他們認爲女性的某些特殊性應得到特別的尊重；若不提供這些優待就是粗魯、怯懦，或者簡而言之是備受鄙視的。”
Today “chivalry” is often used as a term for “gentlemanly” behavior, manifested through courtesy toward the “fair sex”, honor, courage and loyalty.
在今天，“騎士精神”通常指“紳士的”行爲，它體現在對女性的彬彬有禮、尊敬、勇敢以及忠誠之上。
But we see fewer chivalrous gestures these days with old-fashioned dating rituals being replaced with hook-up culture and with many women demanding to be treated equally in the workplace.
隨着過時的約會禮儀漸漸被速食的“勾搭文化”所取代，職場中很多女性要求平等對待，紳士行爲正變的越來越罕見。According to a 2013 survey carried out by the British Daily Mail, only one in seven men will offer their seat to a woman on a bus or train; over three-quarters of men don’t offer to help carry a heavy bag or suitcase for women.
英國《每日郵報》2013年的一份調查顯示，在公交車和地鐵上，只有七分之一的男性願意給女性讓座。超過四分之三的男性不願意主動爲女性提沉重的箱包。In many cases, it’s not because these men are being insensitive, but on the contrary, they say they are reluctant to help women because they are so worried about offending them and being accused of being patronizing.
很多情況下，沒有主動提供幫助的男性並非反應遲鈍，恰恰相反，他們表示這是因爲擔心冒犯到女性，讓她們覺得是在接受施捨。Men unsure
男人們的困惑These men may worry too much. According to the same survey, only seven percent of women view chivalrous acts such as holding open doors as patronizing.
男人們多慮了。上述調查同時表明，只有7%的女性會把開門這一類紳士行爲當做施捨。“Men seem confused by the modern ‘women want to be treated as equal to men’ message”, UK-based psychologist and relationship expert Donna Dawson told the Daily Mail.
在英國工作的心理學家、人際關係專家唐娜•沃森在接受《每日郵報》採訪時表示：“男性似乎對現代‘女性渴望被平等對待’這種說法感到很困惑。”“This message was primarily meant for the workplace and was never meant to replace good manners. Men will always be the stronger sex, physically, and so it is only natural for them to want to show consideration for women.”
“這主要是指在工作中（女性希望被平等對待），但從來不是指拒絕男性的紳士行爲。生理上，男性更加強壯，所以關愛一下女性也是天經地義。”So, should the ideals of chivalry be brought back? US writer and blogger Emily Esfahani Smith says chivalry is a virtue we should all aspire to. Writing on The New York Times website, Smith says as rape culture seems to be spreading across US campuses, many people are lamenting the death of chivalry. But chivalry is not dead yet. Slowly but surely, says Smith, chivalry is making a comeback.
那麼，我們是不是應該呼喚騎士精神的迴歸呢？美籍作者、博主艾米麗•伊斯法哈尼•史密斯認爲，騎士精神是一種人人都要追求的美德。她在《紐約時報》的網站上寫道，在“強姦文化”似乎在美國校園大行其道之時，很多人都在哀嘆：騎士精神已死。但是，騎士精神並未完全消失。史密斯認爲，騎士精神正慢慢迴歸，而且必將回歸。An initiative called the Gentlemen’s Showcase, led by college women on campuses across the US for the past years, rewards young men for helping out others in need. Ordinary people are beginning to see that chivalry contributes to healthy relationships, says Smith. A study of more than 10,000 young people carried out by the University of Michigan found that the No 1 attribute that both young men and women seek in a mate is not money or beauty or intelligence, but kindness, which lies at the heart of the chivalrous act.
過去幾年裏，美國大學女生們發起了一項名爲“紳士秀”的活動，該活動旨在獎勵那些主動幫助他人的年輕男性。史密斯說，普通人也開始認識到騎士精神對於健康和諧人際關係的意義。密歇根大學一項1000多名年輕人蔘與的調查顯示，年輕男女在尋找另一半時考慮的首要因素，不是金錢、外貌，也不是智商，而是善良的品質，而這，恰恰是騎士精神行爲的核心。
