每位母親在僱傭第一位保姆時都會撒的8個謊

You've achieved a major milestone: You've had a baby. No matter how many successes you've racked up in your life before becoming a mother, having a child—through C-section, vaginal birth or adoption—is a hard thing that alters your life like nothing else.

你做成了一件大事：生了個寶寶。不管在成爲母親之前你有多成功，撫養孩子——不管是剖腹產、順產還是領養——都是一件十分困難的事情，會徹底改變你的生活。

But now you have to do a harder thing: Find a nanny to take care of your precious child while you bring home the bacon. I'm not trying to intimidate you, but having a baby cut out of my uterus was only slightly more difficult than my first nanny search.

但現在，你要做一件更有難度的事情：爲自己的寶貝找個保姆，這樣你出門工作的時候，就有人照顧他們了。我並非想要嚇你們，但是順產生寶寶只比我當時找第一位保姆時難一點點兒。

Maybe my boss won't notice if I bring the baby to work every day and stick her under my desk. And good lord, I'd never been so tired in my life. Around week three of my maternity leave, I began to understand why sleep deprivation was such an effective torture device. And don't even ask about my wardrobe! It was a hot mess, all of it was milk-stained.

也許我每天把孩子帶去上班藏在辦公桌下，老闆並不會注意呢。老天，我從未這麼累過。在產假的第三週，我開始理解爲什麼睡眠不足會讓人飽受折磨了。千萬別問我的衣櫃！簡直就是一團糟，所有的衣服都有奶漬。

Against that glamorous backdrop, I had to become an employer. And I needed to employ someone loving, dependable and competent who could help me raise my child. Just the thought of it made me sob. But someone had to watch the baby while I was at work, so I had to get to work.

在這一情況下，我不得不僱傭保姆了。我需要找一個有愛心、可靠而且有能力的保姆，她能幫助我撫養孩子。只是這樣一想我就鼻頭一酸。但我上班的時候必須得有人看孩子啊，所以我必須要開始招募起來。

1. All the good nannies are taken.

1. 所有好保姆都被別人找去了。

2. The only nannies left are psychopaths who are going to steal my baby and hitch a ride to Vegas.

2. 剩下的保姆都是變態，她們要把我的孩子偷走，然後搭順風車去賭城。

3. We will never find someone good by the time I go back to work.

3. 產假一到我必須得去工作的時候，我肯定還是找不到保姆。

4. We cannot afford a nanny so I might as well stay home with the baby.

4. 我們也僱不起保姆，要不然我還是留在家帶孩子吧。

5. Every nanny we interview is judging me and thinks I'm a bad mom.

5. 面談的每一位保姆都用有色眼光看我，覺得我是壞媽媽。

6. I can't possibly be someone else's boss—look at me! I'm a milk-stained mess of a woman.

6. 我不可能當別人老闆的——看看我吧！我是一個衣服上全是奶漬的母親啊。

7. No one is going to love my baby to my satisfaction.

7. 沒有哪位保姆對我寶寶的愛能讓我滿意。

8. Maybe my boss won't notice if I bring the baby to work every day and stick her under my desk.

8. 也許我每天把孩子帶去上班藏在辦公桌下，老闆並不會注意呢。